


She's Her 42

by sanasiopao



Category: Delirium Series - Lauren Oliver, TWICE (Band)
Genre: F/F, F/M, im trying ok, my audience for this fic is like three ppl but im writing anyways, no one in this fic knows how to be heartbroken legally, sana will do anything for them, they do not vibe with the government, this is your reminder to curse a politician today, very slow updates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-31
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:08:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 21,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28324320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sanasiopao/pseuds/sanasiopao
Summary: Minatozaki Sana falls in love with Kim Dahyun, but love is a disease.
Relationships: Kim Dahyun/Minatozaki Sana
Comments: 4
Kudos: 16





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> AUTHOR’S NOTE (PLEASE READ,, only the first three ones are important)
> 
> -This au is set in Lauren Oliver’s Delirium series but I changed a few~ things to it like its history. In this fic, Korea has a democratic government. The economy is down too and Korea is considered as a third world country. I’ll try my best to explain the setting on the story. You don’t have to read the book. 
> 
> -VERY SLOW UPDATES!!
> 
> -The girls are born in the same year. They’re all 17 in this story.
> 
> -i literally do not care about english grammar. i dont proofread anything i post here. we die like a real woman!!!
> 
> -i am always on my energy saving mode so that explains the slow updates,, that and because i write on my phone😭 my laptop broke

She is her 42.

If Sana were to tell you their story, let her start from the very beginning.

Have you ever wondered what the answer to life, universe, and everything is?

As a child, Sana has always been curious. She always has questions and her mother would oftentimes dismiss her. 

One time, she asks her mother “What will happen when an unstoppable object meets an irresistible force?” while watching a rerun of ‘Bill Nye the Science Guy’ on their very thick and very old CRT television. The television’s color display is a bit distorted because she once put a giant neodymium magnet on its side. It hasn’t worked properly since then.

It wasn’t her fault tho! Bill Nye should be blamed for it. Young Sana was only curious. She explains this to her mother plenty of times, but her mother didn’t listen. The whole month, she was assigned to be their household’s plate attendant. It was more than torture having to scrub the plates you didn’t even use. More torture points if the dish was oily.

“You should be thinking of something would contribute to our society,” her mother snaps at her. Young Sana opens her mouth but was cut even before speaking.

“The trouble of being uncured,” her mother shakes her head. It’s something adults often say to children. The words trouble, uncured, and children often belong in one sentence.

No one understands her, and she didn’t understand adults neither. It’s like they’re at the both end of a spectrum that doesn’t connect in the middle, like a glitch in communication she could never fix. 

(She’s on dishwashing duty for a week, and was banned from watching Bill Nye the Science Guy forever. No more Bill Nye the Science Guy~ Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! For her.)

There’s only one person who used to humor her. An imaginary (?) friend, you may say. Or rather a friend she was forced to forget. She entertains all of Sana’s question and even asks some eccentric questions, too.

One afternoon, under the shade of a huge tree in a park where they always play, they both lie on their stomach. Her friend doesn’t mind if her white dress would be stained from dirt. She bites an apple and munches on it.

“Do you think is it okay to believe in fortune tellers?” her friend asks out of the blue. She sits straight up, her once spotless white dress is now smeared with dirt. Absentmindedly, she wipes the soil off but it eventually makes it worse. She flinches on her action.

Sana gasps in surprise, not because of the stain on her friend’s dress, but because of her question. “I haven’t thought of that!” Excitedly, she Indian sits and rocks herself back and forth. “Tell me what you think!”

“Well, do you know ‘fate’?” the other girl asks. 

“F-fate?” Sana pouts. Her nostrils is flaring and her eyebrows are meeting halfway. She can’t recall school ever teaching her a word like that. “I only know ‘ate’ do you mean ‘ate’? Are you hungry?” she asks innocently and sticks her hand in their picnic basket, pulling out another apple from it.

Her imaginary friend chuckles and puts the apple back inside the basket. “No,” she shakes her head, and looks around. She picks a flower and Sana gasps, “Can you do that?” but she ignores her.

“See this flower?” Sana nods. She doesn’t remove her eyes at the flower like it would be gone any second, but what her friend did next surprises her. Her imaginary friend crushes the flower in her palm and a gasp escapes her mouth. 

“Imagine this is you and everybody else in the world.” Her friend opens her palm and the flower’s petals are all over on it. Sana feels sorry for the flower.

“Which petal am I?” 

“You choose.”

“Can I be this petal?” Sana points at the biggest one.

“Only if I could be this one,” her friend points at a heart-shaped petal. Sana lets out a defeated groan because she didn’t see that petal, and she wishes to be that petal now, but her friend has dibs on it.

“Fine, fine,” she sighs.

“Okay, now imagine this is us,” her friend points at their petals. “And these are everybody else in the world.” Anxious for what will happen next, Sana nods her head.

“And this is fate,” a wind blows, and the petals start to ride the wind. Sana yelps in surprise and rises to her feet. She jumps, trying to catch the petals one by one, but only manages to get a hold of one. Running, she goes after her petal, the biggest petal, but before she could grasp it, another strong wind blows and it rises to a height she could not reach.

She puffs her cheeks, sits right beside her friend, and lets out a heavy sigh. “I’m sorry, I could only catch this.” She shows it to her friend. “It’s your petal!” a smile escapes her lips. Even though she didn’t manage to get hers, at least she got her friend’s.

“Now, please explain what ‘fate’ is.” She hands the petal to her friend and crosses her arms.

For a few seconds, silence envelops them. Her friend inhales deeply and sighs. Sana’s getting a bit impatient because, well, what is fate? She wants answers already. Her curiosity is getting the best of her. 

“I just did.” A bunny smile escapes her friend’s lips.

Sana looks at her friend in disbelief. “Eh?!”

*

“Miss Minatozaki?” the man in the middle asks her. She stops herself from remembering the memories that should not even exist in the first place. She should be focusing in the present, as in right now. Because if she doesn’t, her life would end up as a total rug as if it wasn’t one already.

“I-I’m sorry. Could you please repeat the question?” Hate. She hates herself right now. She should focus, but everything around her feels like it sucks the happiness out of her. She has been waiting for this moment her entire life, but it feels wrong.

Ever since this morning, Sana felt like she should not be in this building. A teeny tiny voice has been telling her to run away while she still can. But run away from what, exactly? Run away from her only hope to escape poverty? She thinks the fuck no.

The poorly lit room is made up of steel. In front of her are a panel of evaluators. A neckless woman sits on the left, her neck is barely poking because her fat. Meanwhile, the woman on the right looks like her bones would collapse with a blow of strong wind. The man in the middle looks scary with his big-rimmed glasses and neatly-shaved beard.

On the far corner of the room, a table lies untouched. It’s covered with white clothing, but Sana could tell it’s an operation table base from its shape. She has seen it from movies before. She wonders if it’s the table they use for ‘the’ procedure.

Here’s the deal: When the United States of America declared ‘love’ a disease, the whole world was at panic. It was chaos. Bombs were dropped everywhere. World War II started, and violence was the new normal.

Love, they say, only brings pain and causes people to surrender to insanity, spiraling down to its never-ending consequences. 

It was during September 1939, countries all over the world has split sides. Axis powers (Germany, Italy, Japan, Hungary, Romania, Bulgaria) and Allies (U.S., Britain, France, USSR, Australia, Belgium, Brazil, Canada, China, Denmark, Greece, Netherlands, New Zealand, Norway, Poland, South Africa, Yugoslavia). The two sides competed on who would develop the ‘cure’ for love first.

Months after, they officially named the disease as “amor deliria nervosa”. Love has become a touchy subject. Even from entertainments like movies, songs, and books, the topic of love was banned. 

Six years after, the Allies found a cure for the disease. Many countries absorbed the new system and was eager to get a hold of the cure. South Korea was one of the first country to get it.

The cure only works for adults. If you’re under eighteen, the cure wouldn’t work for you. You could end up with brain damage, partial paralysis, blindness, or something worse like death. Sana’s 17 now. Soon, she’ll have the procedure and she’ll be safe from amor deliria nervosa.

However, for the sake of reproduction and preventing the humanity from going extinct, the government proposed a male and female should be paired with each other. This is where the evaluation takes place. The one Sana’s going through right now.

Before undergoing the procedure, there’s this thing called ‘evaluation’. It is where a panel of professionals evaluate your worth and scores you out of 10. Once evaluated, if you’re a girl, the evaluators would send you a list of partners compatible with you to spend the rest of your life with. The better your score, the better your partner is. The better you score, the higher your chances are for being partnered with someone from the upper class.

A flickering light in the observation deck above the room distracts Sana. On and off. On and off. It was empty, but it feels like she’s being watched.

“Is the light bothering you, dear?” the woman on the right asks. “Our apologies.” She says, but her voice sounds sharp and cold. Rather than being sorry, she sounds quite threatening and her crooked smile sure as hell looks like one.

She can’t believe this, a while ago she’s doing well with her evaluation. Now, she’s butchering it. She could feel her guilt as she remembers hearing her mother shout “Bring home at least a score of 6!” to her before she gets out of their house. Her mother even gave her money for food.

She’s not so sure if she could still do that.

Sana really, really needs to do well in this evaluation if she doesn’t want to be with another stuck up person like her. She needs to do well so she could be matched with somebody who’s wealthy enough to get her and her mother out of poverty.

A while ago she was doing great. She’s not so sure now. If she continues being like this, she might as well kiss her dreams goodbye.

“My apologies if the light bothers you, but we have to continue with the evaluation.” The man says in a tight lip.

“Of course,” Sana sits straight up. She could feel the cold metal underneath her thin hospital gown a nurse gave her a while ago. Her feet feels numb against the tiles.

“So, my question is: Why do you think you were born?” his voice rips into the silence and echoes in her eardrums. 

She gets it now. She gets what her friend meant by fate. Because she was fated to be there. Because she was fated to do something. She doesn’t know what yet, but she knows she’s born to do something, change something, _save_ something.

Her throat feels like a sandpaper. The word is itching like a dry cough. She scratches it, and she’s surprised by how cold her fingers are against her skin. It’s impossible, but she could physically feel the air’s molecules rub against her throat.

The evaluators wait for her answer.

“B-because,” she slaps herself mentally. She should sound confident with her answers, but she sounds anything but confident. “Because the world needs more people to obey and work for the government.” 

What is she doing? Clearly, what she said didn’t sound like ‘fate’ at all. It’s just one word, four letters. What’s so hard about saying that in front of them? What if the evaluators hate her answer? Maybe she should prepare herself to get a low score and practice saying “Good day Maam/Sir! Welcome to Papa John’s!” while wearing a chicken mascot.

Don’t get her wrong, she has nothing against low-paying workers. She’s also one. But like everyone else, she promised herself she would get her and her parents out of poverty, and now she’s breaking that promise. Her vision slowly fades into her sight.

But she’s taken aback with what happens next. Suddenly, the room feels lighter and the expressions on the face of the evaluators soften. She’s not sure if it was her imagination.

“Congratulations, Miss Minatozaki. You’ve finished your evaluation process. We’ll mail you your results.” The man says and pushes a button. A nurse enters and leads Sana to the dressing room.

She changes into her clothes: a pair of jeans faded from being over worn, a thin shirt she bought from a thrift store months ago, and a shoes whose soles are too thin she could feel the floor against her feet.

The nurse guides her out of the room. The hallway feels too quiet she could hear her heartbeat. She couldn’t believe it. She just finished the most important interview in her life. 

She leads Sana to the huge common room where a bunch of teenagers her age are waiting for their friends to finish their evaluation, too. “Congratulations,” the nurse lifelessly greets her before returning inside. Sana hugs herself from the coldness, whether from the nurse’s tone or the ac in the lobby, it doesn’t matter.

Scanning the lobby, she squints her eyes and tries to find her friends. “Sana!” a voice echoes. Everyone, looks at the direction where the voice came from. The guards are alert on their feet, and are whispering to their radios.

Momo’s hand is still in the air while Jihyo is pulling her to sit down and Jeongyeon is covering her mouth. She grins and laughs at her friends as she makes her way to their direction. “Momo, I could feel the second-hand embarrassment.” _WRONG_ , Sana doesn’t feel embarrassed. She’s amused by her friend’s shamelessness.

“Yeah, Momo, what was that?” Jeongyeon whisper-shouts.

“Did you see the guards? They were prepared to tackle you down!” Jihyo says while pretending to read a brochure about the evaluation like nothing happened.

“What embarrassment? What guards? Can we go home now?” Momo asks with her normal speaking voice. But her voice, like Jihyo’s, is naturally loud. Sana’s convinced the two of them either swallowed a whole-ass megaphone when they were a child or their mothers used to feed them microphones and speakers for breakfast instead of milk and baby food. 

Jeongyeon face palms. Jihyo rubs her palm against her forehead. Sana couldn’t help but grin wider at her friends. 

The three stands up. When they did, Jeongyeon whsipers “Holy shit,” and her eyes widen at Sana like she saw a ghost.

“What?” Sana asks. She checks the side of her eyes if she has any morning stars, but there aren’t any. 

“Oh fuck,” Jihyo chimes in after, this time she’s looking past her. Sana looks behind her and sees six girls glaring at them. It then dawns on her. 

“Keep your cool. Keep your cool,” Sana reminds them. EU, Onda, Sihyeon, Aisha, Mia, and Yiren are all watching them like an eagle eyeing its prey. Aisha looks like she’s ready to jump at all of them right then and there. She looks so tall and scary. Jeongyeon is tall too, but Aisha has good three inches to her.

“How can I keep my cool?!” Momo whispers this time. Her voice is shaking. “I swear to god, Jihyo, you get us into fight every damn week.” 

“Well first of all, I am God. Second, they were bullying a freshman!” She defends herself. Jeongyeon signals them to start walking out of the building. As soon as they do, the other girls starts to walk behind them, too. There are a lot of teenagers and guards. As long as they’re surrounded, they won’t be attacked.

“So you decided to put a gum on Yiren’s hair? You know how those girls are!” Jeongyeon says in a low voice. Sana could feel pairs of eyes on her back and the hairs on her nape stands up.

“Keep walking,” she tells the girls.

No one spoke after. The air is thick against their skin and they’re a few steps away from the huge glass door. They take extra big steps and picks up their pace. 

Behind them, the other group of girls picks up their speed, too. Sana swears she could hear their big steps.

A meter away from the doors and Sana could feel goosebumps all over her arms. She swallows a lump in her throat. Momo is unusually quiet beside her. 

As soon as the automatic glass door slides open, Jihyo shouts “RUN!”

And they ran for their lives. 

=

One thing to remember if you want to survive in an all-girls public school is: Every student can take two minutes off their time to kick your butt.

Sana wishes Jihyo had this in mind when she messed with those girls. She puts both her hands on her knees while trying to catch her breathe. They just ran from the building to Momo’s house. 

Momo opens the door and a mountain of used and unused clothes greet them. A bag of chips lies on their small coffee table that was once varnished but is now faded, thanks to years of spilling hot drinks and such. Next to the chips is a carton of fresh milk.

“Am I in a dumpster?” Jihyo has the audacity to say when she enters the house.

It’s a small one. The living room could barely fit all four of them, and the couch could only accommodate three. Usually, it’s Momo who always end up standing or sitting on the floor, but not today because Jihyo owes it to her.

“If karma doesn’t hit you, I fucking will.” Momo glares at her while picking up her sister’s clothes.

Her sister, Hirai Hana, brought Momo with her to Korea when she was still a child, aspiring to be a kpop artist. But she didn’t pass the audition. Now, she works as a dance instructor in a small entertainment company that’s barely making the ends meet.

Aside from being a dance instructor, her sister also does a part-time job in a convenience store at night. She barely has time for Momo then, and now her and her partner moved in with them, she completely lost time for her. Momo barely sees her sister because the entertainment company provides a dorm. Her husband on the other hand, works in a restaurant and the owner provides him a room to sleep too.

Basically, Momo lives alone. But when her sister visits like she did last night to brief Momo for her evaluation, she only trashes the house. Momo always cleans her mess. _Momo always ends up fixing her mess._

“There’s no food in here,” Sana whines and sits down on the couch. The couch’s foam is thin and she could feel the wood on her butt, but she’s used to it by now. She has been in this house long enough to remember how soft the couch was when it was still new.

“Yeah, so is yours. This is reality, Sana, not a fucking dream. Everyone is starving.” Sana rolls her eyes at Momo who made a painfully fair point.

“Not me, I’m DEHYDRATED.” Jeongyeon pushes Jihyo off her way and reaches for the milk. She chugs it all down in a gulp, not leaving a single drop. Her face looks crumpled and she makes a chewing sound with her mouth. “THIS TASTES LIKE COW PISS!” she shouts. A flock of bird flies away from Momo’s fence and a neighbor shush them up.

“Oh, that expired already,” Momo laughs her ass off. Sana laughs so hard she’s holding her stomach and is nearly falling off the couch. The coffee table and cramped space are the only thing stopping her from dropping to the floor.

“Omg deserve,” Jihyo claps, her eyes are literally glimmering as she flashes her gummy smile.

“And you didn’t tell me?” Jeongyeon throws the empty milk carton at Momo who quickly dodged it. 

“Relax, you drink our school’s tap water. You’ll be fine,” Sana reassures Jeongyeon, but that doesn’t remove the fact Jeongyeon drank an expired milk.

“If my stomach hurts later, I will update you every time I go to the bathroom, Hirai.” Jeongyeon says. Momo fakes a huge smile, showing her full set of teeth to annoy Jeongyeon more.

“Can we talk about Jihyo? Is she still allowed to make decisions?” Momo changes the topic and sits in between Jeongyeon and Sana. She reaches for the opened bag of chips on her coffee table and tastes it. When she deems it still edible, unlike the expired milk Jeongyeon had drank, she offers it to everyone. Sana sticks her hand and takes a handful.

“Momo, whatever you do, I’m still the head bitch in charge and you can’t do anything about it.” Jihyo says confidently. Momo and Jeongyeon simultaneously groans and rolls their eyes at Jihyo. Sana’s too busy getting the chips’ crumbs at the corner of the bag.

But it’s true tho, Jihyo’s the perfect one to lead them. Jeongyeon is capable too, but she prefers doing the legwork than leading them. Jeongyeon was actually the first candidate to be in charge of their group, but she turned it down. She says she’d rather follow than lead.

If Momo or Sana leads them, they would end up in a juvenile detention center a few minutes into action.

None of them wants that.

“As the hbic, it stands for head bitch in charge Momo and Sana, in case you don’t know,” Jihyo points at the two of them. Sana rolls her eyes at Jihyo and Momo does the same. “We’ve gathered here today because of Sana.”

“Actually, no, Jihyo. We’re here today because of you.” Sana reminds everyone of what happened earlier after their evaluations. “I was supposed to tell everyone over text.”

“Well, time is gold and we should not waste it. Spill it already,” Jihyo crosses her arms and lifts her chin up to assert her dominance in the group.

“I got good news,” Sana grins at them and she got all their attention. Momo stops pushing Jeongyeon who’s taking up a lot of space, and Jeongyeon stops annoying Momo for the sake of entertainment.

Jihyo’s eyes widen in excitement. “Is it a new job?” 

“About damn time we get a new one. I’m so tired of having sleep for dinner.” Momo rises to her feet and raises both of her hand like she’s resigning herself to the universe. “Hallelujah!”

“Same,” Jeongyeon says, empathizing with Momo. Well, it doesn’t take a genius to know no one is NOT starving unless you belong to the middle or upper class. Apparently for them, they belong to the lower class.

Sana pulls out their so-called burner phone, a second-hand android phone they all worked hard for. They bought it from Shin Ryujin, a student who’s a year younger than them. She pushes the on button and a minute had passed but the phone is still off.

“Wait,” she knocks the phone on Momo’s coffee table a few times. “Finally,” the phone lights up. 

“A student wants a revenge on four of her schoolmates because apparently,” she squints her eyes and quotes “’they made me look like a fool in math class?’” furrowing her eyebrows, she looks at the girls. “What the fuck, right?”

“Idk ‘bout you but that sounds like a brat to me. Like a Xavier girlie or something,” Jeongyeon tells them.

There are only two schools in their small town. Technically it’s four. One administration handles two campus: one for boys and one for girls. Boys and girls are not allowed to be in a same class. The campus for boys and girls are at the both ends of town, so they would not run into each other.

The public school where Jihyo, Jeongyeon, Momo, and Sana are studying is called Springfield Industrial School for Girls (for Boys if you are one). It’s, well, the literal definition of hell. They’re sixty per class and there’s only one restroom per floor in their building. In a floor, there are four classrooms, so there are approximately 240 students who share the same restroom.

Also, the girls in their school are known to be chaotic, more chaotic than Jihyo, Jeongyeon, Momo, and Sana combined. 

On the other hand, the private school is the opposite of Springfield. It’s called Xavier Academy for Girls (again, for Boys if you are one). Their classrooms are air-conditioned. There are enough restrooms. There are water-fountains in contrast to Springfield’s faucet at the side of their building where everyone drinks.

But the student there are known to be spoiled-brats and such. Of course, they are. They do not know the struggle of having to boil a kettle of water because your family can’t afford a freaking heater or have sleep for dinner like Jihyo, Jeongyeon, Momo, and Sana. 

“You’re right. The client’s from Xavier,” Sana confirms. Jihyo, Jeongyeon, and Momo lets out a collective gasp.

“We can’t accept that!” Jihyo tells them and enumerates all the reason why they can’t do it. First off, they don’t look like a Xavier girlie. Second, they do not have it in them to blend in such a well-fed and born with a golden spoon type of crowd. They’re already having trouble blending in with kids from their class, what more of people who are the exact opposite of them? Hell no.

“I know I said I’m starving to death, but tbh I would skip this one.” Momo says, sinking into her couch dispirited. 

“You’re saying that because you haven’t heard the price of the payment yet~” Sana says in a singsong voice. All their ears perk up and suddenly Sana gets their interest.

“How much is it?” Jeongyeon asks her.

“₩200,000” Sana says in a cheerful tone. Before the girls could celebrate, she raises her index finger and adds “each.” 

“Holy shit,” Jihyo holds on to the coffee table for support. She hasn’t hold a money that big ever in her life.

“I know I said I’d skip this one, but I take it back.” Momo says, both her hands are gripping her hair’s roots, still dazed by how big the money is.

“I need time. Give me a moment to think about it.” Jeongyeon says, with her head hanging down. This is by far their biggest gig ever, and this is the first time Jeongyeon wants to back down.

Their former highest paying gig was when they locked someone inside the school bathroom because the girl spreads a rumor about how the client was cheating in an exam. Later on, the school finds out the client’s name is clean and did not cheat.

They received ₩24,500 each for that one. Now, they’re offered with a request that’s ten times the prize of their highest paying one. 

“What?” Sana looks at Jeongyeon.

  
  
“Why?” Momo slaps Jeongyeon’s knee.

“Just,” she clicks her tongue. She brushes her hair and grips her roots. The group rarely sees her frustrated. She’s more of like the chill type of girl who’s always composed. And she mostly only loses her composure when things are getting out of control. They’re not in trouble now. Things are in control. So the three of them shot her a concerned look. “Give me time, okay?”

Jihyo, Momo, and Sana exchanges glances and silently agrees. They didn’t push the topic further.

“But I need to fix it with the client already.” Jihyo says, and Jeongyeon nods. 

“We’re the perfect team for this.” Momo says in a low voice while sinking into her seat, but everyone heard it. Both Jihyo and Sana give her a warning look. If Sana was beside her, she would’ve stepped on her foot already or something. 

“Let me handle this from here,” and just like that, the HBIC in Jihyo is awaken.

=====

Sana opens the door to her house and was greeted by radio silence. Like Momo’s it’s small and cramped. When you enter, you’re greeted by the kitchen on the right living room on the left.

On their small, three-person sofa is her mother who probably just got off work. She’s still on her uniform and it seems like she was in the middle of unbuttoning it but fell asleep while doing so. Sana lets out a heavy sigh. 

She enters her bedroom to get her blanket and pillow and goes back to the living room. Carefully, she lifts her mother’s head and put the pillow under. She wraps her mother with the blanket like a cocoon. 

Signs of aging is visible on her mother’s features. The wrinkles on her forehead are more evident now. The white hairs are more visible now, too. Maybe her mother aged faster because Sana thinks she was a pure headache when she was a child. 

She doesn’t want this. She doesn’t want any of this. She doesn’t want to see her mother exhausted. At this point of life, she should be living a luxurious life unlike the one they have now. 

Sighing, she goes to her room. Under the pile of her neatly folded shirts lies a small box she has been hiding from her mother for months now. She opens it and rolls of money she’s been saving up greet her.

Sana pulls a crumpled won from her pocket and tries to strengthen it. Her mother gave it to her this morning. Her mother woke up late and told Sana to get breakfast on the way to the evaluations. But Sana had coffee before going and would rather save it for more important things like now.

She only needs a few more won to buy the bag her mother has been eyeing on for months in time for her birthday. If they pull their gig on Xavier well then, she’d have a few money to spare and buy herself a new pair of shoes because the soles of her current ones are thin now.

All her life, Sana longs for her mother’s affection. She couldn’t remember the last time she hugged her or the last time she held her hands. Her mother doesn’t even cook breakfast for her anymore. Ever since Sana learned to do things for herself, her mother has let herself be.

It goes like that for everyone who underwent the procedure. Every spark of warmness leaves their body and all that’s left is a cold robot-like human being wired to serve the current society they are in right now. 

Sana hopes her mother could provide her comfort in cold days, that’s why she’s saving up for an expensive gift. Because she knows how materialistic her mother could be, and maybe, just maybe, she’d give Sana a tight hug or a pat on her shoulders, that way Sana could feel the warm in her mother’s frozen heart. But Sana isn’t really expecting something big.

To see her mother’s smile is enough.

Her father on the other hand disappeared when she was ten. He used to work in Japan and sends them money every month. Sana had no idea what kind of work he did. Her mother never told her.

Until one day, her father stopped sending money and Sana doesn’t receive calls from him anymore. He disappeared like a bubble without a warning and left them to starve. Her mother had to work all day for the two of them.

The last time Sana saw him, she was eight. She still remembers what he said, and it confuses her until now. She often thinks about it.

_“You will always be in here,” her father puts his hand on his left chest._

“You will always be in here,” Sana puts her hand on her left chest and taps it.

She wonders what he meant by that.

==

“Keep your miserable ass away from me,” Momo shoos a pouty Jeongyeon away from her and acts like she’s a disease. Jeongyeon frowns at Momo before rolling her eyes.

“Bad day?” Sana asks Jeongyeon and pats the space beside her. Jeongyeon nods and massages her temple. Sana feels sorry for her friend. “Want to talk about it?”

After a few attempts to convince her in the little time they gave her, Jeongyeon finally gave in. Jihyo and Momo did all the convincing part. Sana knows how stressful this could be to Jeongyeon. Being there as a friend is the least she could do. 

“No,” Jeongyeon says in a soft voice. Its 8:00 in the morning and Jeongyeon’s having a bad day already. Meanwhile there’s Momo who’s swaying her hips to their neighbor’s music Sana doesn’t know the title to while going through all the stuff Jihyo has brought.

“Jihyo, did you make sure Momo drank her meds today?” she turns to her.

“Nothing works for her anymore. I did my best.” Jihyo says sincerely while her hand is on her chest.

“Hey!” Momo stops and shots them a glare. 

“Sit down Momo, we have a long day today.” Jihyo takes the paper bag away from her and pushes her beside Jeongyeon who grunts as soon as Momo sits down beside her.

“Why am I always the one to suffer?” Jeongyeon says while trying to ignore Momo who’s showing her puppy eyes while puffing her cheeks.

“You’re always the best one to annoy,” Momo laughs her ass off at Jeongyeon who’s face is more crinkled than Momo’s shirt.

“Enough of the both of you,” Jihyo claps, getting their attention. Her aura changes and that’s when you know the serious version of Jihyo is channeled. All of them sits properly, ready to listen attentively.

From the paper bag, Jihyo pulls out uniforms of Xavier. Momo and Sana lets out an audible gasp. Jihyo smirks at the two of them. 

She gives them one pair of uniform each. Sana traces the lace of the uniform. The cloth used in this is thicker and the materials look expensive. Compared to their uniform, so thin you have to wear an undershirt so your bra can’t be seen or it’s so thin you have to wear multiple layers of long sleeves to protect yourself from the cold.

“On Saturday next week, Xavier will hold their annual foundation day. The security won’t be as tough, so the client has secured a way in for us. That’s when we’ll hold our operation.” Jihyo starts. 

Each of them was given a white folder. “That’s our targets.” Sana opens the folder and was greeted by a beautiful girl. Her long, black hair looks soft and the moles in her face looked like constellations. Her face has soft features but she exhibits a strong aura.

“But she looks like a good friend,” Sana says. If Sana gathers up the courage to befriend her before crumbling at the sight of her, she would definitely do so. To Sana, the first target looks intimidating but fun to be friends with.

“Hey!” Jihyo snaps her fingers three times. “Put your head in the game, Sana. Do you want the money or what?” Sana pouts and sinks on her seat.

“That’s Myoui Mina,” Jihyo sighs and shakes her head. “I couldn’t get a gist of what she’s like from the client. The client keeps on saying she’s ‘the bitchiest of the bitch’.” She massages her temple. 

“Luckily Ryujin agreed to help. Jeongyeon, I’ll let you handle Ryujin. I haven’t texted her back yet.” Jeongyeon nods, her attention is still on the image. “According to her, Myoui Mina’s grandfather is the president of Myoui Inc. etcetera etcera.” Jihyo gestures her hand in a random manner. “In short she’s rich and she’s a bitch.”

“She got a student expelled from Xavier because they messed with Chaeyoung, her friend we’ll talk about next.”  
  
  


“We won’t get expelled from Springfield, right?” Sana asks worriedly.

Jihyo scoffs in disbelief. “Of course, no way her power extends to public institutions.” She assures her. “Just- let’s just do our best not to get caught.” Jihyo fakes laugh and chokes at her own saliva.

“You okay?” Momo asks.

“Of course, of course.” She clears her throat and tries to compose herself. Sana and Jeongyeon exchanges suspicious look, but let Jihyo goes on.

“Next one is Chaeyoung,” they all flip their pages. Sana sees a young, adorable girl with huge eyes and a mole under her lips.

“But she looks so sweet!” Sana exclaims.

“Sana, are you here for friends or for money?” Jihyo frowns at her. “Focus!” 

“Sorry,” she purses her lips together and didn’t say a word again.

“Chaeyoung is a bit,” Jihyo struggles for words. “Different. The client says she doesn’t know much about her except she’s different.” 

“What do you mean different?” Jeongyeon asks.

“Don’t know. Don’t care. I’m here for money not to get to know some random Xavier girlies.” Jihyo replies. “But Ryujin says she likes unique things and doesn’t condone to societal norms. Says here she also likes to draw.”

“Can we move on to the next one?” Momo asks impatiently. Jihyo rolls her eyes at Momo before proceeding to the next one.

“Chou Tzuyu,” Jihyo says while looking at her picture. The girl has huge eyes and perfect features. All of them were quiet for a moment.

“She looks like an angel,” Sana says while admiring Tzuyu. None of them answers, their eyes are glued to her picture, admiring her beauty.

“She- she’s a model.” Jihyo pulls herself together. “From Taiwan, but she grew up here. She- woah” Jihyo couldn’t help but be amazed by her visuals. “No wonder she’s always booked with photoshoots.”

“Booked with photoshoots? She’s famous?” Sana asks.

“Don’t tell me you don’t know her?” Jihyo asks. “She’s THE Chou Tzuyu. Come on, everybody knows her.” But Sana remains silent as well as the other two beside her. “Jeongyeon? Momo?” Jihyo asks them, but the two shakes their heads.

“Do you live under the rock?”

“Kind of,” the three of them answer in unison. Jihyo forgets all of them work their asses off and has barely time to pay attention to this kind of things. Let alone buy expensive magazines Chou Tzuyu models for.

“Anyway, she’s Chou Tzuyu aka the most beautiful face of 2019 according to TC Candler.”

“Who’s TC Candler?” Momo asks. Sana and Jeongyeon shrugs their shoulders, unaware of whatever nonsense Jihyo is talking about. 

“They publish 100 most beautiful faces every year and Chou Tzuyu ranked first last year.” 

“Things like THAT exists?” Sana asks, surprised by what Jihyo said.

“Yeah, yeah aiishh!” Jihyo gestures wildly. “Can we go back to business?” She asks while raising the folder and her other hand is on her waist. The three of them zips their lips. Jihyo mutters her thanks and continues reading.

“According to the client, Tzuyu doesn’t talk much. She’s quiet but attentive in class which is why she hates her guts.” Jihyo frowns, trying to remember something. “Oh, she likes dogs.” She giggles. The three exchanges confused glances. Jihyo seems to notice, so she cleared her throat and erases the grin on her face.

“Anyways, Chou Tzuyu the supermodel from Taiwan. Next.” 

All of them flips the pages. 

Sana feels something inside her spark.

It reminds her of that breeze during the last day of school before winter break. She couldn’t explain it. It’s like the well-deserved break you’ve waited for all year long. Her aura screams of warmth, comfort, and… home. 

Something Sana hasn’t had for a long time. 

But if she’s so unfamiliar of the feeling, why is she feeling it right now and towards a stranger’s pic at that?

“Kim Dahyun,” Jihyo starts. The name rings on Sana’s ears like bells. Jihyo shoots her a warning look, waiting for her remark. But honestly, Sana is out of words. 

“She’s the student body president, top of her class, the perfect student they say.” Jihyo continues when Sana didn’t say any word. “She plays the piano, and she plays good. I heard she played for an orchestra once.” 

Sana doesn’t hear what Jihyo says next, doesn’t know if Jihyo said anything after that. She’s too absorbed with Dahyun’s picture. She scans her profile and sees her favorite food.

_Dahyun likes chocolate_ , Sana notes in her mind.

_Her nickname is ‘Dubu’ because she’s as white as dubu._ She takes another mental note.

_She likes a singer named IU._ Sana makes sure to listen to her later.

“Now we know our target here’s our plan,” Jihyo closes her folder. She goes on with the plan. Momo and Jeongyeon listens attentively.

Meanwhile Sana thinks about Dahyun the entire meeting.

==

Jihyo slaps Momo’s hand away from the car’s power window’s button. “Don’t touch anything,” She warns Momo in a low voice.

“How come your car isn’t this clean?” Momo asks Jeongyeon who’s on the shotgun.

“Because it’s old and the three of you ride in my car, Momo. Now sit back.” Jeongyeon answers. Her silver manual transmission Honda Civic 2002 has been their getaway car during their work and random drives at night when they have enough money for gas.

In contrast to the expensive 2019 Sedan Jaguar XF they’re riding in right now, Jeongyeon’s car looks like trash if it weren’t already in the first place. Unlike the neat interior of this car, Jeongyeon’s car is filled with food crumbs and garbage. It’s not that she doesn’t clean it because she always does. It’s just Jihyo, Momo, and Sana are REALLY messy. 

On Jihyo’s left sits Sana who’s admiring the uniform the client gave them. It’s D-day today. They’re inside the car the client provided while wearing Xavier’s uniform.

All of them prepared for this day. Jihyo and Jeongyeon made sure everything is perfect and Momo and Sana know about the plan. They couldn’t fail if they don’t want to get expelled from Springfield aka the only school would accept them because there is NO way Xavier would let them study for free.

Sana made sure to scrub all parts of her body, even the spaces between her toes. She even applied a face powder and put a little bit of lip and cheek tint.

“Did you bring your cheek tint?” Jihyo whispers.

“Yes,” she whispers back. Jihyo asks for it. Sana gets it from her pocket. It’s nice to have a pocket again. Sana’s uniform from Springfield’s pocket has holes, and she still haven’t sewn it close. She hands the cheek tint to Jihyo who diligently applies it.

“Me too, me too,” Momo insists. Jihyo sighs and put some on Momo. On the shutgon, Jeongyeon shakes her head. 

The gigantic gate of Xavier greets them. Momo lets out a shriek and Sana couldn’t help but join her. Jihyo pinches the two of them while the driver glares at them through the rearview mirror. Jihyo flashes him a sweet smile, so does Jeongyeon. The driver shakes his head.

“What did Jeongyeon and I said?” Jihyo asks Momo and Sana. The duo purses their lips and sink on their seats.

The driver parks the car between two expensive looking cars Sana doesn’t know the model of. Jeongyeon’s the first one to get out. Jihyo reaches for the door in Sana’s side and remove Sana and Momo’s seatbelt for them. The duo mutter their thanks while Jihyo pushes them outside.

“Are we in a parking lot or a car showroom?” Sana asks. Momo goes to Sana’s side and points a pink Lamborghini. The two of them gasps, admiring the car.

“Are we here for a mission or to slack off?” Jihyo snaps. “Focus!” Samo frowns.

“I still don’t like this idea.” Jeongyeon scratches her head.

“Don’t tell me you’re backing out now? Where’s the Yoo Jeongyeon I know?” 

“It’s not like that, Ji. I-“ Jeongyeon lets out a deep, frustrated sigh. “Never mind. Let’s finish this ASAP.” 

While on the way to the comfort room where they’ll prepare everything they need, the group once again go through their plan. In between discussing, they couldn’t help but admire how beautiful the institution looks. 

Mostly it’s Momo and Sana overreacting, sometimes Jihyo would gasp too. Jeongyeon reminds them to calm themselves down and try to blend in. It’s getting a little obvious they’re not from there.

The hallway is marble, unlike in Springfield where they have to do floorwax every Friday to keep it shiny only for it to be dirty again in thirty minutes. The white paint looks new unlike in Springfield where the paint is peeling off and the walls are filled with graffiti. The whole aura of the school screams well-taken care of unlike in Springfield where, despite all their efforts, screams chaos.

The students look prim and proper too. No one is running on the hallways. No one is wrestling. No one is shouting. All of them walk in poise and elegance.

Momo gasps. “She’s wearing an LV,” she says with her eyes wide open. “to school!” A few students shoot them confused looks. Jihyo and Jeongyeon ignores them. Sana waves her hand at them which Jihyo immediately stops.

“Yeah, Momo that’s how rich kids are now shut your trap.” Jihyo says while holding Sana’s hand tightly. “You too, Sana I expect you to behave better than Momo at least.” Sana pouts at Jihyo who immediately pats Samo’s backs.

“Maybe I’ll treat all of us at the diner if we pull this off successfully.” Jihyo cheers them up and the grin in Samo’s faces widen. Free food never fails to brighten their mood.

Good thing most of the students are in the field, enjoying their day. Their targets are probably there right now too, ignorant of the chaos that will happen to them later. Sana mutters her apologies in her mind.

If only she didn’t need the money, she wouldn’t have done this. The same goes for the other three. Karma should spare them out, _but the universe is cruel._

They enter the restroom where the client prepared everything they needed to proceed with the operation. With their teamwork, they all prepare the things they need for their mission. Jihyo once again go through their plan, making sure they don’t fail.

“I take care of Myoui Mina.” Jihyo points to herself. “Jeongyeon take care of Chou Tzuyu. Momo, Son Chaeyoung.” Momo nods while taking care of her things. “And Sana,” Jihyo turns to her. “Kim Dahyun.” The two of them say in unison. 

Sana’s heart skips a beat.

Maybe she’s nervous.

“Yeah yeah, now we wait for the signal.” Jihyo nods, satisfied with everything.

Jeongyeon looks at her watch. “Any minute now.” The girls sit on the sink while waiting. The comfort room has three cubicles complete with bidet and toilet papers. The sink’s faucet is working too and there are hand soaps.

Sana feels jealous. In their school, you have to fetch a pail of water and carry it through three flight of stairs because their room is on the third floor. You also have to bring your own soap. Despite Springfield being an all-girls school, sometimes their restroom smells like pee.

A familiar bell rings and the three of them immediately stood up. Each of them takes the bucket assigned to each other and goes directly to the hallway they’re supposed to be in. 

“Fuck,” Sana mutters under her breathe. She carries the bucket filled with ice and water with her two hands, but it’s too heavy and the wire is digging in on her palms, hurting her.

“Need help?” Momo asks, but didn’t wait for an answer. She uses her right hand to help Sana carry her bucket and uses the left to carry hers. Sana flashes her a smile and the two of them catches up with Jihyo and Jeongyeon half-running, half-walking.

The four of them go to their designated positions and wait. Jihyo and Jeongyeon keep on looking at their wristwatch, keeping track of their timing. “They should be here by now.”

They’re currently at a second floor of a building where no students could be found. Each of them has a window and bucket for their targets. 

“There, there!” Jihyo whisper shouts. The four of them readies their bucket. Sana has trouble carrying hers, so Momo helps her.

“On my cue. Wait for it.” She says. Sana could already see their targets approaching, being lured into their trap.

“Now!” The four of them simultaneously pour the ice-cold bucket of water on each of their targets successfully. 

With her quick reflex, Myoui Mina, the girl who seems to be their leader look up and saw their faces. The four of them gasps and quickly duck below the window.

“Did she see us?” Jihyo asks.

“I don’t know but they sure as hell did,” Jeongyeon nods toward two men in black at the end of the hallway.

“Run!” and all of them did.

“HEY!” The men call them out.

“WHY THE HELL ARE WE ALWAYS RUNNING?” Momo shouts while sprinting as fast as she could. Sana isn’t much of a runner, so Jihyo and Momo are half-dragging her. Jeongyeon on the other hand stops when an intersection of hallways greets her.

The three of them finally catch up. “Let’s split up and text each other later.” Jeongyeon says while choosing the direction ahead of them.

“See you!” Jihyo chooses the left, and Momo chooses right. Sana was left alone, unsure of which direction she should take.

“Stop right there!” The men in black call out. For a split second, Sana felt like having a heart attack but didn’t have a time to.

“Momoriinnggg!” Sana shouts before choosing the direction Momo went to. Momo is nowhere to be found, and Sana does the only thing she could think of right now. 

She enters the nearest classroom and hides there. She locks the door and sticks herself to a wall below a window. Her heart is racing so fast it feels like it would beat out of her ribcage. She covers her mouth while trying to catch her breath. A bead of sweat falls down her finger.

Heavy footsteps could be heard in the hallway, and Sana assumes it was those men. She holds her breath. Sana prays she won’t get caught. 

“Where the hell did that girl go?” A man with a deep voice asks. Sana closes her eyes tightly, and feels her heart beat faster if it’s even possible. She feels like fainting right there and then.

“You go that way, I go there.” Another man says. 

Then, Sana hears their footsteps, implying they are going away from her location until she couldn’t hear them anymore. She peeks at the window and relief gushes over her when she sees the hallway empty. She inhales and exhales heavily while fanning herself using her hands. Her knees are shaking and her lungs feel like it hasn’t had oxygen for centuries. 

The cold floor meets her. Sana sits while trying to calm herself down. She remembers the breathing exercise her childhood friend taught her. Inhale through your nose for four seconds, hold it in for seven, and exhale loudly for eight. She repeats this method until her breathing steadies.

She wonders how her friends are doing and hopes they don’t get caught. Jihyo and Jeongeon can handle themselves and she’s sure they won’t get caught. Momo on the other hand has the equal chances of getting caught as her. But Momo is a good runner. Right. She can outrun those men. Considering the situation a while ago, the odds of Momo getting caught is low, which relieves Sana.

Sana stands up and looks around the classroom. She has always wondered what the classrooms in Xavier looked like. Now she’s inside one, she couldn’t help but be really jealous.

Instead of metal table and chairs that either has lose screws or needs wielding, each student is provided with study tables made from wood and comfy office chairs. Instead of chalkboard, they use white boards that is either new or well-taken care of to look like one. They even have a computer set and a projector hanging from the ceiling.

She looks at the table in front of her, and her attention was caught by something under the table. Curiously, Sana pulls a white pencil case whichhas a doodle of a face smiling at the front. ‘Dubu’ is embroidered on the lower left of the pencil case.

“Dubu?” Sana gasps. “Kim Dahyun?” She gets the notebook under the table and checks for the name. True enough, ‘Kim Dahyun’ was written on the first page. 

Coincidence isn’t real. At least that’s what Sana thinks so. She thinks everything happens for a reason and everything is connected like chains. 

How slim are the chances of hiding inside her target’s classroom and finding her desk anyway? Sana doesn’t know the math but she’s sure as hell it’s slim.

Grinning, she flips through the pages of Dahyun’s notebook. Her notes look neat and aesthetic. She uses pastel-colored highlighters, does calligraphy, and writes in between the lines. Sana couldn’t help but chuckle when she saw a perfect score in a seatwork Sana doesn’t know the topic of. 

At the back of her notebook, a few doodles could be found. A variety of small, block with a smiley face similar to the one on her pencil case filled the pages. There are strawberries too with ‘Chaeyoung’ written underneath the drawing. Sana recognizes the green character from Star Wars and has ‘Tzuyu’ before it. Lastly, a penguin is drawn beside Mina’s name.

They must’ve been so close. Sana used to draw things like these too behind her notebook when she’s bored in class. A puppy for Jeongyeon. Unicorn for Jihyo. Raccoon for Momo. Hamster for her. She laughs at the memory of it. It feels childish now she has seen other people do it.

Sana puts back Dahyun’s things to the way it was before. At the corner, she sees a white scrunchie and gets it. It must be Dahyun’s, obviously. By now, Sana assumes Dahyun’s favorite color is white.

She jumps a little when her phone vibrates. Jihyo, Jeongyeon, and Momo bomb their group chat with messages.

**_HBIC HEAD BOOMER IN CHARGE_** (Jihyo): Lets meet at the parking lot

 ** _IGNORE AT ALL COST_** (Jeongyeon): okay.

 ** _YOUNG DUMB & BROKE <///3_** (Momo):

-HAVE YOU SEEN SANA

-DON’T TELL ME SHE GOT CAUGHT

-WHERE IS SHE

 ** _HBIC HEAD BOOMER IN CHARGE:_** YOU LEFT HER?

 ** _YOUNG DUMB & BROKE <///3_**: IM SO SORRY SANA

 ** _IGNORE AT ALL COST:_** where did you last see her?

 ** _YOUNG DUMB & BROKE_**: SANA IF YOURE ALIVE PLEASE BREATHE

 ** _HBIC HEAD BOOMER IN CHARGE:_** TF WE GONNA DO NOW

Sana laughs before typing her reply.

**_Sana_** :

-IM OKAY

-I HATE YOU MOMO

 ** _YOUNG DUMB & BROKE <///3_**: U R ALIVE

 ** _IGNORE AT ALL COST:_** You didn’t get caught?

 ** _Sana:_** LUCKILY NO

 ** _HBIC HEAD BOOMER IN CHARGE:_** Samo you remember the way to the parking lot

 ** _Sana:_** YEP

 ** _YOUNG DUMB & BROKE <///3_**: DO YOU THINK IM DUMB PARK JIHYO

**_HBIC HEAD BOOMER IN CHARGE:_ **

-lets meet in ten. The clients waiting.

\- and yes think u r dumb momo

 ** _YOUNG DUMB & BROKE <///3: _**YOU WILL NEVER SEE THE GATES OF HEAVEN

Sana pockets her phone and makes her way through the parking lot.

===

Hate at first sight is what Sana would call it. Bae Joohyun or Irene, like what she calls herself, stares at them judgingly from head to toe. Sana rarely gets pissed, but she is right now. 

The client’s look isn’t very friendly. Now she gets why Mina decided to make a fool out of her in front of the whole class. At this point, she’s thinking Irene probably deserves it.

“Ah-ha-ha-ha.” Irene chuckles softly, then laughs loudly her tonsils is showing off. She looks like a Disney villain and it honestly alarms Sana. Jihyo, Jeongyeon, Momo, and Sana exchange worried look. The client continues laughing, then stops to look at Jihyo straight in the eye.

Startled, Jihyo jumps a bit and her eyes widen. “Ah-ha-ha-ha?” she copies Irene’s laugh. “hehehe” then turns to Jeongyeon for help, but the girl only avoided her gaze. She then slaps Momo’s butt. Momo was about to say something, but Irene interrupts.

“Have you seen the look in their face?” No one answers. Sana doesn’t know about the others, but she didn’t even see Dahyun’s face and everything was too fast to make out the details of Mina’s

“It was magnificent! Priceless! Ah-ha-ha-ha!” she crosses her arms and laughs with her chin up. A grin surfaces on her face. Everything about her makes Sana’s blood boil.

“Ah-ha-ha-ha! Give us our money already before we shave your head. Ah-ha-ha-ha!” Sana snaps. 

Irene rolls her eyes and opens her bag. She takes out huge bundle of money. Sana could feel her eyes turn into star shaped. Momo lets out a gasp beside her. 

“Here,” Irene hands the money to Sana. She panics because she isn’t a human money counter machine and it’s the biggest amount of money she has ever hold. She passes it to Momo who passes it to Jeongyeon immediately, almost knocking out the air in her lungs. 

Jeongyeon counts it. She stops and clicks her tongue. Irene’s eyes widen and her grin disappears. “Where’s our bribe?”

“Bribe?” 

“What, you expect us to shut up and make it easier for you?” Jihyo butts in. She pulls her most intimidating gaze and hands her palm. “Five thousand won each.” 

“Ah-ha-ha-ha!” Irene rolls her eyes. All of them remain silent and looks her dead in the eye. “Wait you’re not joking?” Her eyes widen.

“And what will you do if I don’t want to pay?”

“Oh, a few things.” Sana says confidently. She hears Momo’s amused “Ooohh” and feels her slap her butt.

“Like what?”

“I don’t know, like something worse than what we did to your ‘friends’.” She says, emphasizing the word friends.

“Fine,” Irene groans and hands them the money. “This is illegal.”

“Oh, baby, trust me. We know the law.” Sana says teasing. She gets the money and raises it. “Ah-ha-ha-ha!” Sana laughs while waving the money. “Ah-ha-ha—ouch!” Momo elbows her. She sees all of her friends’ hands on their waist. She clears her throat and hands it to Jeongyeon.

When Jeongyeon finishes counting, she slaps the money on her palm and it was music to their ears. “It was nice doing business with you.” Sana shifts the weight on her foot and bites her lips to prevent herself from squealing. She now has enough money to buy her mother’s gift and buy herself a new pair of shoes because the soles of her current one is already thin.

“If you know a friend who needs our help, please don’t hesitate to ring us.” Jihyo wraps up. Irene rolls their eyes at them and scoffs. 

As soon as the client disappears from their sight, the four of them jump in joy.

==

Jihyo has always been passionate about singing. She used to join singing contests not only for the prize money but also for her talent and passion. They even call her _Jihyonce_. When their section is the one assigned for the flag ceremony, shee’s always the one to sing the national anthem and Springfield hymn.

But lately, she refuses to join contests. Sana thinks it’s because she wanted to join a band for real now. Jihyo has been talking about it for quite some time now.

And Sana was right.

One lazy afternoon in their classroom during their break, Sana was styling Jihyo’s hair into one huge braid while Jihyo’s reading a book. Beside her, Jeongyeon’s doing their Calculus homework. In front of Jeongyeon, Momo’s sleeping.

Then, Ryujin comes into their classroom out of breath. She asks for Jihyo, whose braid is still halfway done. Sana tries to stop her, but Jihyo says it could wait.

When Jihyo returns, she has a huge grin on her face. She looks so happy her undone hair doesn’t even bother her. 

Momo looks at Sana and says “Has anyone ever told you, you can’t do hairs?”

“I did.” Jeongyeon pauses with the homework and looks at Sana. “You can’t do hairs.”

“Shut up, she looks cute.” Sana tells them while returning Jihyo’s smile. She chuckles with her nose scrunching and eyes smiling.

Little did they know Ryujin booked a band audition for Jihyo.

Now, Sana’s waiting for the group to pick her up and accompany Jihyo to her audition. She sits on the front porch of their house. While waiting, she feels a shiver down the spine. She thinks it was the wind and goes back inside to get her coat.

When she returns, she feels like someone was watching her. She hums a nursery rhyme and bounces her leg. She bites her fingernails and peels the soft skin around it. 

The noise from their neighbor was not enough to distract her. She’s used to it by now, really. In their neighborhood, you’d be more surprised if a day goes by without people shouting at each other.

The houses in their neighborhood are small. All of it looks the same. Empty. Lifeless. Abandoned yet people still live in it.

She flashes a nervous smile to Shin Yuna, the child living on the house next to them. Yuna is playing with her plushie’s ears, ignoring her parents who are fighting inside.

After a few moments, she sees a familiar car slowly moving. Her heart starts to beat normally and she fills her lungs with air again. Relief rushes to her body. Seeing her friends make her feel safe and protected. 

A few meters before arriving at Sana’s doorstep, she could already hear Momo complaining about how slow Jeongyeon is driving. Momo calls Jeongyeon ‘Grandma’ eversince she got her license and has always told Jeongyeon she’s slower than a turtle and Jeongyeon has always ignored her.

Meanwhile, Jihyo on the shotgun is already warming up her voice with those weird routines Sana never got used to. Plugged on the car’s stereo is an unfamiliar song Sana guesses would be Jihyo’s audition piece. She’s wearing a wayfarer with a new leather jacket she probably bought using their recent pay.

Sana couldn’t help but chuckle at the sight of her friends. She always forgot how chaotic they look in the eyes of other people. But they don’t care as long as they’re having fun.

“I’m sorry we’re late it was Momo’s fault.” Jeongyeon greets Sana. 

“It’s not my fault I was out of food!” she punches Jeongyeon who didn’t even flinch. Six years of friendship makes you immune from your friends’ punches.

“It’s okay.” Sana tells Jeongyeon. “Did you eat already?” She turns to Momo.

“Yeah, I ate at Jeong’s.”

“Woahhh, our Jihyonce’s looking good!” Sana smiles at Jihyo who removes her wayfarer and winks.

“Did you already memorize your song?”

“Memorize?” She scoffs. “Of course! Let’s get it.” Jihyo removes her shades and punches the air. Sana chuckles at her friend’s energy. She better gets in the band if they don’t want to see the wrath of Minatozaki Sana.

Or more like Jihyo better get in the band if they don’t want to see a whining hamster until they let her friend in.

Suddenly, it feels like someone’s watching Sana again. She stands up straight and looks around. In the house in front of hers, she sees a silhouette peeking through the curtain. As soon as she looks at it, the girl opens the curtain widely and flashes her bunny smile. 

She never changed.

She still wears the same white dress and still has the same bunny smile. Her cheeks still look fluffy even after all those years. But the bags under her eyes look darker. She looks so tired but at the same time so full of life.

Sana wants to ask her how she’s been, but she can’t.

“Sana, you okay?” Jeongyeon looks at her worriedly then looks at the house in front of hers. 

“Yeah,” Sana nods at Jeongyeon. When she looks back at the house, the girl was already gone.

“What the hell are you waiting for? Get in already.” Momo opens the door for her. 

For the last time, she looks at the house, but the girl is nowhere to be found now. She sighs and gets in the car.

“Where’s the audition?” The three exchanges stares and look hesitant.

“Uhhmm, Golden Heights.” Jihyo says while scratching her nape.

“What?” Sana asks, surprised. She has never been there before because only rich people live there. And by rich people she means Xavier type of people. Bourgeoisie type of people. Those who do not care as long as they profit from other people and other people meaning those who are at the bottom. Like them.

“Are you sure about this, Ji?” Jeongyeon looks her in the eyes. Beside Sana, Momo purses her lips and stays still on her seat. 

Jihyo sighs. “Come on, girls. You know I’ve always wanted to do this.” She says in a whiny tone. “Besides, we can’t tell what they’re like for sure unless we meet them, right?” She looks at Sana because she knows Sana understands her the most when it comes to this. 

Sana sighs and nods at her. “As long as you’re happy.” 

A gummy smile etches on Jihyo’s face and a chuckle escapes her lips. “You’re the best, Sana.”

Jeongyeon shakes her head but eventually agrees. Momo agrees, too. Who are them to hinder Jihyo’s happiness, anyway? Jihyo has done everything for the three of them. Without her, they would literally starve and lose direction in life. This is the least they could do for her.

During the drive on the way to the location, the three of them were quiet. The only sound you could hear is the car’s stereo and Jihyo’s warm ups which were very loud by the way.

No offense, their friend has a really good voice. She probably has the most beautiful voice out of everyone Sana knows. But sometimes she could be really, really noisy. Like a megaphone is pointed directly on your ears.

Six years of friendship got Sana used to a lot of things but never of Jihyo’s loudness.

“We’re here,” Jeongyeon announces.

Momo opens her eyes and looks like she just got back from dead. “Thank the universe.” Sana immediately elbows her and wakes Momo up. 

Compared to their neighborhood, this one screams RICH. The road does not have any bumps in it. The streets are clean, Sana can’t see a single litter. No one is screaming at each other’s throat, and the houses, although big, are devoid of any sign of life.

Sana is not thrilled to see such a quiet neighborhood. It screams wealth, but it also screams emptiness. She hates it.

“Oh, the house looks smaller than I expected it to be.” Jihyo says while looking at the bungalow. Although the house only has one floor, it’s still bigger than all four of their houses combined.

“No, not that.” Jeongyeon says. “That.” She points at the house on the other direction.

The three of them engage in a collective gasp. The house has two floors and each one could basically fit three to five of Sana’s. It has a mixed combination of black and white, and its architecture has a minimalist touch to it.  
  


This is the kind of house Sana sees in magazines and newspapers whenever their teacher asks them to bring one for art purposes. It’s the type of house all four of them would stare at and admire first before proceeding to their art work.

It’s also the type of house they all fear because they assume that kind of house belongs to people who do... well who do _things_.

“They’re not part of a mafia, aren’t they?” Jihyo asks. No one answers, not even Jeongyeon who’s also mesmerized by the huge house.

Jeongyeon opens the door and gets out first. “Let’s go.” The three of them follow. Excitement immediately takes over Jihyo as she leads her group.

“I swear, girls, I’m having the time of my life.” She faces Sana and Momo and starts to walk backward. “First, we had that big mission. Then now I have this band audition.” Jihyo puts her wayfarer on the collar of her shirt and shows off her new leather jacket “I even rhyme! See what I did there? Mission, audition?” She chuckles.

“Nothing could go wrong.” Jihyo turns her back to Momo and Sana. As soon as she did, Myoui Mina shows up. 

The four of them are frozen in place.

“Oh, aren’t you from our school?” Mina asks.

“From our school? Unnie her form says she’s from Springfield did you forget?” Son Chaeyoung shows up followed by _THE_ Chou Tzuyu.

“No, I’m pretty sure I saw them at our school.”

“What do you mean? I haven’t seen them before.” Kim Dahyun, the student council president, appears.

“I don’t forget faces especially those who throw a bucket full of water and ice at us.” Mina smirks.

All of them wanted to retreat. Even Jeongyeon who’s the quickest on her feet couldn’t say anything.

Sana does the only thing she could think of.

“Momo, quick. Code blue. Code blue.” she whispers.

Momo fakes a faint.

Jeongyeon and Jihyo rushes to Momo. “Oh no, Momo. We told you not to eat the shit out of that jokbal all by yourself so early in the morning.” Sana says while brushing Momo’s hair. She looks at the other group. Chaeyoung’s hands are on her mouth. Tzuyu’s eyes widen. Dahyun’s eyes are wide and her hand is on the air, like reaching, but was too stunned to continue her movements. All of them look genuinely concerned except for Mina who’s still smirking.

Dahyun was about to run at Momo, but Sana signals her not to. The other girl frowns, but stays at her place. It their first real interaction (and the future Sana wished she paid more attention).

“Our poor Momoring. We need to get her home already.” Jeongyeon joins the act.

“She had too much jokbal for breakfast, but trust me she’ll be fine when we get her home.” Jihyo explains to the other group without looking at them.

“Did it work?” Momo whispers then opens one of her eyes. When she opens it, she sees mina towering behind Jihyo who’s kneeling beside her.

“Well, we’re fucked.” At that moment Momo feels like fainting for real.

And just like that Jihyo had to kiss her non-existent career good bye.

**_#_ **


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry for making you wait

Sana looks at the paper bag. On it is written a brand not too luxurious nor cheap. She can’t believe it. Months ago, she only dreamt of buying it for her mom. Now, she actually did it.

When she was younger, her mother would bring her to the mall to stroll whenever she’d get a high score in a test. And every time, her mother would always stop in front of the store to look at the bag.

Her mom had always admired it. A black leather handbag. Quite plain, actually. She doesn’t get what her mother saw in it, but if it’s what her mother wants then who is she to judge?

Sana was a good student. Keyword: was. Her teachers and mother thought wrong after all. She couldn’t find it in her to be the student she was when she was younger. Maybe she got burnt out. Maybe she really wasn’t smart. Maybe she realized the system was never fit for her to succeed and she lost the will. Whatever the reason was, Sana couldn't care less now.

She tilts her head to read the brand. She chuckles. Her mother would love it for sure. She wonders if she could get a warm hug. Her mother’s birthday is three days from now, but she can’t wait to give it to her already and see her reaction. She doesn’t have the patience to wait for another three days when she could give it to her today.

Carefully, she places the paper bag on their coffee table. When she thinks it’s a bit splayed, she fixes it and makes sure it’s placed on the center. She sits back, places the both of her hands on her lap while her knees are together, and looks. It still looks wrong.

Fidgeting, she taps her fingers on her knees. It looks wrong but there’s nothing wrong. She stands up and places it on their deflated couch. She looks at it and wonders if her mother will notice it first when she enters the house.

“No,” she shakes her head. Their house is small, but her mother would go straight to the kitchen to drink a glass of water when she gets home. Sana thinks of putting it on their dining table, but their front door flies open.

“Mom—” Sana says, wide eyed. The bag is on her hand, and she feels like a child caught doing something she’s not supposed to. 

“Don’t you have somewhere to go to?” Her mother closes the door behind her and sighs as she rubs her temple. Sana immediately runs to her and takes her handbag she has been using for years. The leather is worn off and peeled. 

“Not my shift yet,” she guides her mother to their couch. Then, she goes to the kitchen to get her mother a glass of water. When she comes back, her mother is checking out the paper bag.

“What’s this useless thing you bought again?” She frowns at Sana.

Her child smiles at her. “It’s for you.”

“For me?”

“Yeah, it’s an early birthday gift. Open it.” Her mother flashes her a confused look before doing so. She smiles to encourage her. Deep inside, she tries to conceal her excitement. It takes everything in her not to squeal and jump on the seat beside her mother.

Her mother frowns at her. “You really don’t learn, do you?

“What?” Sana sits beside her. She gets her mother’s old bag and shows it to her. “It’s all worn off, see?” she shows her all the peeled off parts.

“And where did you get the money?” she glares. The three dots at the back of her mother’s ear burns. It hurts Sana too much to look at it. 

Every cured person has that scar. Three dots placed like a triangle behind their ears. It’s the sign someone has already undergone the procedure. 

“I’ve been saving up.” She smiles, trying to lift her mother’s spirit. But her mother shakes her head and massages her temple.Her mother’s hand lies beside hers. 

Sana’s tempted to hold it. She looks at her mother who’s not very happy with what she did and decides against it. Her mother would burst if she held her hand for sure.

“You really are your father’s child.”

Sana avoids her mother’s gaze and closes her eyes. She feels the weight beside her being lifted, telling her her mother stands up. “Can I ask something about him?” She says almost whispering.  
  


“You’re still curious about that man? All these years, I suffered to keep you alive without him, and you still think about him?” Sana could feel her mother’s voice shake. She looks at her and tries holding her hand to calm her down, but her mother slaps her hand away. She wishes she closed her eyes a little longer.

“No, don’t touch me. How ungrateful of you. I know the life I give you isn’t good enough to send you to Xavier, but at least show some respect.”

“It’s not like that, mom.” Sana turns.

“And now you’re talking back? Huh, when you get cured you’ll be so ashamed of yourself right now.” Her mother crosses her arms and avoids her gaze. 

Sana could feel tears threatening to escape her eyes. Then, a drop falls. She immediately wipes it. She could feel her breathing get uneven, so she takes deeper breaths. She inhales before saying “I’m sorry, mom.”

Of course, what did she expect? Obviously her mother would be mad. At her father. At her. But it’s her fault for not being considerate enough, right? 

Her mother suffered the most when her father disappeared, she should know it because she witnessed how their life went downhill. From the bottom, to the very bottom.

“If you’re really sorry, you wouldn’t ask about him. I told you this the first time, but you didn’t listen.” Her mother’s tone isn’t very soft now. With their thin walls and cramped neighborhood. She’s sure as hell their neighbors could hear them right now.

She doesn’t know what to say. The first time Sana asked her about him was when she didn’t get a call from her father in a month. As a child, she was naturally curious as to why her father hadn't called in a month when he made sure to call her almost every three days.

Gently, she wipes her tears away. She doesn’t want to hold a grudge against her mother. Of course it was hard for her to raise a child on her own. 

It’s not her mother’s fault she gets triggered every time Sana mentions her father. She should have been more sensitive.

“I’m sorry, mom.” she says again.

“Governor Kim will give out relief goods at your school later. Go get ours.” Her mother says coldly. She gets her things and turns her back at Sana. “I’m tired.” She shuts her door loudly. Sana jumps in surprise.

It was always like this with her mom.

* * *

The sun burns against their skin. She leans closer to Jihyo who’s fanning herself with one of Governor Kim’s flyer. Sana doesn’t know where hers went. She thinks she drops hers. Beside her, Momo lets out a loud sigh.

“He’s already fifteen minutes late. Can VIPs respect our time, too?” She crosses her arms. They’re in their school’s field right now, where the relief goods will be distributed. They’re patiently waiting for the Governor while the whole town’s cramped into the field. 

“Momo, lower your voice. Other people might hear you.” Jeongyeon hits her with her baseball cap, snatches her flyer and wraps her shoulders around her. She uses it to fan the both of them.

“Oh yeah? I don't care. They can all come at me and I will fistfight them one by one.” she raises her fist.

“Momo, I will fight beside you.” Sana punches the air while doing sound effects, her famous osaka punch move.

Jihyo hits Sana and Momo with her flyer. “Is fighting all you’re good for?” She hits them again. “Can you stop talking about fighting?”

“You’re saying that like you don’t get us into a fight every damn week,” Jeongyeon snaps at her.

“Ouch,” Jeongyeon shouts at Jihyo when she hits her. “What the fuck was that for?”

“You’re really taking sides on this one, Yoo? I thought you’re supposed to be the neutral one.” Jihyo scoffs.

“Who said I’m taking sides?!” Jeongyeon wraps her arm around Jihyo’s neck and brings her down to pinch her ears.

“Yah, Yoo Jeongyeon!” Jihyo tries to get out of Jeongyeon’s arms, but she can’t. She looks for Sana’s hands and signals her to help her. But the girl is chanting “Fight! Fight! Fight!” with Momo.

Before an adult stops them, the crowd splits into two. Men wearing black suits run to clear the way. And in the middle, Governor Kim waves his hand and smiles at his people. The governor has arrived.

Jihyo catches her breath and fixes her hair. She squints to see better. “I thought someone finally came to arrest you.” She elbows Jeongyeon. 

The other girl glares at her. “If you don’t shut your mouth, I will turn you in.”

Their ‘leader’ shrugs her shoulders and forces them to form a straight line. “Behave so we can get ours immediately and go home. I have a band practice at three.”

“Can we come?” Sana asks her.

“Sure, Dahyun will be glad to see you.” she smiles at her. Sana giggles when Jihyo mentions Dahyun’s name. She made four (three) friends when Jihyo joined her band.

Kim Dahyun is a pure ball of sunshine. Sana would argue with anyone who thinks otherwise. That girl is her breath of fresh air after a long day. Something about her makes Sana feel at ease. When she’s around her, everything becomes lighter and all her worries disappear.

Dahyun—

“What’s Dahyun doing here?” Momo asks them.

“Where?” Sana immediately looks around the crowd. 

“There,” Momo points to her direction. “Dahyun, Dahyun, Dahyun!” Momo jumps while calling the other girl, but it’s too crowded and loud Dahyun doesn't hear her.

“Does she need relief goods too?” Sana frowns. That doesn’t make sense. Dahyun’s rich. She’s from one of the wealthiest families in their town. Why would Dahyun need relief goods?

Jihyo swats her again with her flyer. “She’s obviously here to help distribute.” Jihyo looks at the flyer that says ‘Governor Kim for President.’ “I wonder if they’re related.

“She’s his niece.” Jeongyeon says absentmindedly while watching the girl. The three of them look at Jeongyeon. “What?”

“How did you know?” Sana eyes her suspiciously.

“I—“ Jeongyeon trails. “I connected the dots! They’re both Kim, see?” Jeongyeon shows them the flyer. 

“That makes sense, but what if she’s his daughter?” Jihyo asks.

“Eyyy, you know the Governor only has one son.” Jeongyeon elbows her.

“Ohh,” Sana and Momo teases. “As expected of our college girl.” Sana ruffles Jeongyeon’s hair. Jeongyeon hits her with her cap to make her stop.

The whispers around them grow. The adults start talking to themselves. Confused, Sana looks around trying to pinpoint the center of attention.

They flash the girl who just arrived a judging look. Everyone forms in a group and exchange words about the girl.

“Is that?” the adult in front of them asks.

“Yeah, yeah, it’s her. Lower your voice.” the other person warns them. Sana looks at the girl, and closes her fist too tight her knuckles turn white.

“Why is everyone talking about her?” Jihyo asks them.

Momo shrugs. “No clue.” 

Jeongyeon on the other hand looks at Sana. She looks at her like she’s trying to tell something. Perhaps something only the two of them know.

Slowly, Sana feels like she’s being suffocated. Her breathing becomes heavy and the air around them feels thick. She can feel her sticky sweat against her skin. The sun is also not helping.

Sana steadies her breathing. She still wears the same white dress and same innocent look on her face. Like how she saw her in their house before Jihyo’s audition. She wants to drag her out of there and save her from all the ruckus, but she can’t. She just can’t.

She wants to talk to her. Wants to know how she has been. Wants to know where she went all these years. Wants to _apologize_. 

“Sana, you okay?” Momo fixes her hair. 

Sana lets out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. She closes her eyes and whispers weakly, “Yeah.”

“Do you know her?” Jihyo presses.

Know her? Does Sana know her? Is it the right question to ask? For sure, Sana knows her. But the real question here is if the other girl still knows her, because Sana hasn’t stopped thinking about her all these years. And now she’s back. With no warning. No heads up. No news of how she’s been all along.

Before Sana could answer, a person in front of them catches their attention. The people around them start clapping and cheering. Sana gets pushed by a stranger and Jihyo pushes the stranger back. Jeongyeon pulls Sana closer to her and Momo to protect her.

Governor Kim stands at their makeshift stage. Behind him, there’s a huge banner that says ‘GOVERNOR KIM FOR PRESIDENT’. His official color is red and white. 

Sana finds it ironic. Why would you use red as your color when clearly it’s been prejudiced with so many ideologies people would rather forget. She doesn’t get it for now.

The governor greets his people. The same people he slandered. The same people he threatened to demolish their houses for the sake of building new infrastructures to ‘improve’ their town when in reality it’s to manipulate them into giving up what they have for the interest of the ruling class.

Something inside Sana angers, why is it so easy for them to disregard small people like her for just so they could earn more? They’re greedy. They're selfish. 

A small figure catches Sana’s attention. She almost forgot Dahyun’s there. A ray of sunlight hits Sana’s eyes, and it creates a halo above Dahyun’s head. The girl’s skin is glowing.

She was never religious. Sana questions a lot of things about religion. It’s inevitable, really. In this age of Science, the bible goes against so many things Science can’t explain. Like _love_. Sana shakes her head. Amor deliria nervosa. Like amor deliria nervosa. 

If humanity was created out of amor deliria nervosa, then why is it that _it_ has caused so many casualties?

She questions a lot of things from the bible. But for a second, after seeing Dahyun, Sana thinks she saw a real life angel.

  
  


“When I become the president, I assure each and every one of you I will keep in mind all your concerns and will do my best to fix it. As your fellow citizen from this small town of ours, I swear I will make sure our town will be well-known, a lot of people will invest in us and our lands.” The people clap and shout. They started chanting his name and praising him for his words.

But they’re forgetting one thing, they don’t have an economy of their own and more investors means more people getting kicked out of their houses to build infrastructures. Sana wants to shout.

It’s not the change they would all want. It’s not the change all of them have been dreaming of collectively. He’s a traditional politician, and his words are empty.

Then, she looks around her. It occurs to her. Cured people are the robot of the government. Regardless of their class, people would do anything for the government. It’s how cured people are wired. One word from the government and they’re satisfied.

They don’t even care about change. Don’t care if they get kicked. It was only the youth sector that cares, and the youth sector that wants change.

Adults never listen to them and always tell them they would never understand. They’re young and their beliefs are still clouded, but they’ll eventually understand after the procedure.

Cured people paint after procedure as paradise. Because all you have to do is work your ass off until you feel like fainting, then you’re good to go. 

They like being a slave for the system. They like being used by the system. They like to chew on the red pill so bad they forgot the blue pill exists.

“Do you think he’ll win?” Jihyo lightly punches Momo’s shoulder. Momo looks at them with clouded eyes. Sana looks at her fists and sees her knuckles are white. When Momo realizes Sana’s looking at it, she stretches it open and avoids her gaze.

“I’m not victim blaming, don’t get me wrong, but you know how ignorant cured people can be.” She shrugs. “And it’s not like the opposing candidate’s well known. I didn’t even know about him before he announced he’s running for president. Had to search him up first, remember?”

The three of them nod. Momo once explained to them that the opposing candidate is a congressman who likes to work behind the shadows.. or rather dodge his responsibilities but still manage to look like he’s doing his job.

Out of everyone, Momo’s invested in politics the most. At first, Sana didn’t really understand, but after Momo patiently explains to the three of them what’s _wrong_ about the system. She eventually did.

For an ex lumpenproletariat (or maybe they still are considering their last gig at Xavier was not too long ago), even though some do not consider them as proletariat, they _know_ too much about what’s happening _inside the border._ And everything they know, they know through Momo and pc number thirteen they always share at an internet cafe they often spend their entire afternoon at. 

(This is not the pre-cure era, but maybe because if a revolution were to spark, proletariats would be the one to lead it because they have the leadership, patience, and everything you need in the rev movement. They're also the one who experience the oppression first hand and take the most critical hit out of it.)

People start falling in line properly. They started distributing relief goods. On the front of the bag, the governor’s face is printed together with a slogan that encourages people to vote for him. Of course he would not let this kind of opportunity pass. What did Sana even expect?

Beside them, whispers start growing. “Where did she get the courage to show up here?” a middle-aged woman whispers to the person beside her. 

Sana looks at the direction they’re looking and sees the girl. She could feel her blood boil. Honestly, she rarely gets pissed. She’s always the sunny girl who brings smiles whenever she goes, even Jeongyeon, the most aloof of them all, would agree to this.

She tries to ignore the whispers around them. Instead, she looks at Dahyun who’s giving out relief goods herself. The girl smiles as she gives a little girl a bag. When the little girl almost dropped it, Dahyun’s agile enough to help the girl while flashing her what Sana thinks is the most beautiful smile in the world.

Unconsciously, she smiles to herself, but it immediately disappears when she hears another remark from the woman beside her. “That girl should be arrested already. She can’t go around spreading amor deliria nervosa!”

That triggers something inside Sana. She shrugs, trying to rid the negativity in her body. She cocks her head to the side as she inhales deeply, trying to calm her nerves down. Behind her, Momo massages her shoulders gently. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” she answers almost immediately. She doesn’t want to get her friends suspicious or worried. 

They’re one of the earliest ones because Jihyo still has to cook lunch for her sisters, and they’re out of food so she’d use the goods. So they’re one of the first people in line. 

Sana eyes the girl, just like everyone else, but not with judging looks. When the girl looks around, she sees Sana looking at her. Sana avoids her gaze but catches Dahyun’s. 

Then, Dahyun smiles at her. She couldn’t help but to smile back. It’s a roller coaster of emotions, with that girl and Dahyun around. 

Dahyun does not need her attention, but she sure as hell likes it when the girl’s attention is on her. Naturally, she likes it when all eyes are on her, but it’s different with Dahyun. When it’s her, it feels like the whole world disappears and it’s just the two of them having their moment.

Sana sees someone approaching the girl in the white dress. He has a bag of relief goods with him. The man gives it to her and signals for her to leave. The girl freezes at first, staring at the bag of food. Then, the man tugs her wrist. Sana could see the girl flinch both in pain and surprise.

Good thing it was Jeongyeon’s turn already. She pulls back the girl and switches places with her. “Hey!” Jeongyeon protests.

“I’m sorry. She’s my friend.” Sana tilts her head to Jeongyeon and smiles at the distributor, a middle-aged woman.

“Not after this, I don’t think so!”

The woman shots them a bored look. “Last name?”

Sana’s attention was at the girl in the white dress. The man’s explaining something to the other girl. Whatever it is, Sana has no idea what it's about. The woman in front snaps her finger. “Last name?”

“Minatozaki,” Sana answers. The woman types on her tablet and nods. She gets a bag and gives it to Sana.

The girl in the white dress nods and agrees to leave. She starts walking away.

“I need you to sign here—”

“Sign it for me,” Sana shoves the bag to Jeongyeon and runs. She follows the girl. She hears her friends calling her, but she ignores them. She needs to talk with the girl. 

“Excuse me,” she squeezes her way through the crowd. She sees the girl turn left, then disappears. “Excuse me!” Sana repeats louder as she makes her way through. She kind of has an idea where the girl is going.

They used to talk about it before. Sana knew about it because of her, and she’s thankful. She thinks the girl’s gonna use the old gate at the back of the school. They often use it to cut class.

Sana clearly remembers talking to the girl about it. They were supposed to cut classes together when they reached high school. Would it be weird to say it was in their bucket list to cut classes together?

They even got it planned, but they never got to. Something happened. Something that changed their relationship.

Her footsteps echoes through the empty hallway. They could’ve studied together here, but the universe had to interject and said no. It robbed them of good memories. It robbed them of opportunities.

_She could’ve been friends with Momo, Jeongyeon, and Jihyo._ Sana thinks to herself. She could feel her breathing getting uneven. She was never a good runner.

When Sana turns to the corner of where she thinks the girl went, she holds onto the wall and catches her breath for a moment. It was an old gate no one uses. Rust and signs of corrosion hugs its metals. Grass finds its way everywhere, Jihyo once joked a snake could live in there.

She looks around and sees no one, but the metal grill at the corner is swinging. It means someone just sneaked out. Sana approaches it and looks. 

_She could get wounded if she wasn’t careful._ Sana knows because Jeongyeon once cut herself with the rusty metal. It’s the reason why Jeongyeon has a scar on her leg, although barely visible. 

Her parents scolded her because they cut classes at the time, and they had to bring Jeongyeon to the hospital to get an anti-tetanus shot that caused them money. Nothing is free here, not even healthcare.

She grips on the gate and climbs two feet above the ground , trying to see if the girl’s still around the area, but there is no one around at the other side of the gate. She guesses the girl ran as fast as she could.

“Sana,” a familiar voice calls. 

Sana lands on her butt. She closes her eyes in pain “Ouch.”

“Are you okay?” Dahyun runs to her and helps her stand up.

Sana opens one eye and smiles. “Dahyun-ah!” She says in her high-pitched voice and stands straight . Absolutely surprised to see the girl. She flinches when she feels her butt still aching and tries to hide it. “What are you doing here?”

“You left when you got your pack. I wanted to say hi.” Dahyun tucks her hair behind her ear.

“I see,” Sana nods. She wipes the dirt off her hand with her pants. The both of them stand in silence. Sana waits for Dahyun to say something, but the other girl remains silent.

Sana wonders why Dahyun would follow her all the way here just to say hi. She realizes Dahyun probably ran after her bec the girl isn’t familiar with their school. And the girl is still catching her breath.

“Uhm, hi.” Sana waves her hand and chuckles.

Dahyun chuckles, too. “Hi.”

Sana loves it when Dahyun’s giggly. Everything about it, her eyes, her smile, the sound of her laugh, both the light that Dahyun gives and Sana’s energy when she hears Dahyun’s laugh could power an entire power plant, Sana thinks.

“You have a band practice at three, right? We’ll be there!”

“Really?” The smile on Dahyun’s face gets bigger. “Then what snack should I prepare? Do you want anything? Just tell me.”

“Hhmm,” Sana trails. “I’m fine with anything, but can you buy bread for Tzuyu?”

“Sure! I’ll wait for you later.” 

Sana nods. The other girl plays with the hem of her shirt like a child. Sana panics. She’s the more talkative one, so she feels the pressure to keep the conversation going. Sana’s about to ask her when’s their next gig, but the other girl speaks.

“What are you doing here, though?” The girl’s tone is hesitant.

Sana thinks of an answer. What’s she doing here? She even left her friends back there. Sana slaps herself mentally. For sure they’d ask a lot of questions when she gets back. She just has to avoid them as best she could.

She opens her mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. She thinks of lying, but she doesn’t want that. She wants to be honest with Dahyun. What was the real reason she ran all the way here to follow that girl? 

“I was hoping to say hi to someone, too.” Sana smiles bitterly. It has been years since they last talked. She misses her like any other friend would.

“I see,” Dahyun nods. Silence envelops them once again.

“We should get back,” Sana suggests. “You still have to distribute those goods right?”

Dahyun nods.

* * *

Although she has been in Dahyun’s house multiple times, Sana still could not absorb it all. This house is different from the one where Jihyo did her auditions, although that too is owned by Dahyun.

This house is overlooking the sea. The neighborhood feels new to them. There are barely any houses around, but Sana could tell all of it were owned by well-off families. Jihyo would’ve gotten lost if Jeongyeon wasn’t there with her. 

Apparently, Jeongyeon knows all the nook and cranny of their town. Which Sana finds intriguing because they grew up together and they barely left their neighborhood.

When Sana confronted her, Jeongyeon reasoned out she’s a human gps. Sana believes her. Jeongyeon’s the smartest of them, after all.

This house is smaller than the one they went to before. It’s like a small beach house, but still bigger than Jeongyeon, Jihyo, Momo, and Sana’s houses combined.

It’s bright and refreshing, as any beach house should be. It has two floors which Sana could easily navigate through unlike the house before. 

Sana also found out Dahyun stays in the beach house and not in the mansion. The girl says it makes her feel more at peace there. Unlike the mansion where loneliness fills the air.

The helper didn’t need to guide them, they easily remember the way to the band’s practice room. When they enter, Mina and Dahyun are already there.

Dahyun stands up when she sees Sana. The girl flashes her a smile and she smiles back. She looks at Mina and smiles too, but the girl rolls her eyes.

“Yeah, keep rolling your eyes maybe you’d find a brain back there.” Momo says before jumping on the bean bag directly across to Mina’s. 

“We’re still waiting for Tzuyu. She has a magazine photoshoot. Chaeyoung went with her.” Dahyun interrupts before Mina could answer to save them from another bickering.

But Mina won’t back down without a fight. “For your information, I am the top student of my class.” She says casually.

“And how many are you in class? 20? 30?” Momo opens a can of soda and takes a sip. “Besides, getting high grades is useless. The passing grade’s seventy five, what would you do with the remaining grade?”

“And studying is not for everyone,” Sana adds.

She’s on Momo here. If her younger self could see her right now, she’d be disappointed for sure, but life taught Sana there are things more important than grades. And their future is kind of laid out now, there’s nothing they could do.

“What did you say you’re gonna take up in college again?”

“Not going to college. Only Jeong will. Right, college girl?” Momo tosses them a soda can one by one. Sana manages to catch hers, luckily.

Jeongyeon nods. Sana notices she’s unusually quiet whenever they're with Mina. Understandable, really, the first time Sana met Mina, she was scared of her too.

“She has decent grades. Not as good as yours but decent enough to get into a state university or something. Jihyo has decent grades, too! We’re not all losers.” Momo says proudly.

“I don’t plan on going to college, though. I’d rather work.” Jihyo says before taking a sip of her soda. Sana remembers why Jihyo doesn't want to go to college. 

She still has two younger sisters. If she goes to college, that means both her sisters would have to stop studying because they could not afford to send one to college while the two study. They also still have to eat.

For Sana and Momo, however, they just don’t find it worth it. It’s too late to fix their grades, too. It’s helpless.

“Wait, if you’re not going to college then what do you plan on doing after high school?” Dahyun asks them.

“Find decent work,” Momo raises her index finger.

“Save up,” Jihyo chimes in.

“Hope we’d match with someone wealthy,” Sana adds. It’s what her mother always told her. She doesn’t need to study well. She just had to do good at the evaluation so she’d match with someone decent.

Aside from the last part of evaluation, she thinks she did pretty well. She won't complain if she gets paired at least with someone from the middle class. Anyone that's not from their class would do, really.

“Please, you’re nearing young-adult and you still have no plan in life?” Mina scoffs.

“Oh yeah? Tell you what we’ve been having a mid-life crisis since we were twelve.” Momo defends themselves.

“I am not a teen. I am not an adult. I am suffering, that’s what I am.” Jihyo says absentmindedly and takes another sip. 

“You think like that ‘cause you’re privileged. Who said finding work and getting matched is not a plan?” Sana frowns.

Jihyo clicks her tongue and shakes her head. “You pay for Xavier to get you detached from reality?”

Before Mina or Dahyun could answer, the door flies open. “Band practice!” Chaeyoung punches the air. She jumps at Momo who’s the closest one and drinks her soda. 

“You’re all here!” The girl stands up and gives them a hug one by one. Sana smiles at her. She’s the loudest one. Sometimes, Sana wonders how she could fit all that energy in such a small body.

“Woah, our Tzuyu is booked. Being pretty must be tiring.” Sana stands up and offers Tzuyu her chair. 

When the taller girl takes a seat, Sana massages her shoulders just like what she does to her mother, Jeongyeon, Jihyo, and Momo when they're stressed. She guesses she’s do it for her new friends, too.

“Not really, I’m just fine. I can still function, you see—” a flying pillow meets Momo’s face. It was from Mina.

“Oh yeah, Dahyun.” Jihyo says. “We were wondering what's your relationship with Governor Kim?”

“Jeongyeon said she's your uncle.” Sana turns to her.

“That’s right. How did you know?” Dahyun asks Jeongyeon. 

Jeongyeon’s eyes widen. “Intuition.” Mina scoffs at her answer.

“I see,” Dahyun nods. “Well, he’s my uncle. Why do you ask?”

“We were just surprised to see you at school a while ago,” Momo answers. The girl nods again. 

Mina clears her throat. She claps her hand and gets the band to work.

‘TWICE’ is their band name. When Sana asks them why, Dahyun tells them they wanted to touch peoples’ hearts twice – once with their eyes and another with their ears. They used to perform in their school only.

When they decided to perform outside and widen their audience, their main vocalist had to move to another place because of her family. That’s where Jihyo, steps in as the band’s new main vocal.

Mina’s their lead guitarist. Chaeyoung as bassist. Dahyun as keyboardist. Tzuyu as drummer.

Of course, they only sing songs from the Library of Approved Music and Movies or LAMM. It’s a list of Music and Movies approved by the government that do not contain any traces of amor deliria nervosa.

Before Jihyo, it’s Chaeyoung and Dahyun who used to arrange the band’s version of songs. They like to call themselves “DubChaeng bros”, courtesy of the one and only strawberry princess, Son Chaeyoung.

Now, Jihyo helps arrange them too. Jeongyeon, Sana, and Momo pitch in their opinions for their music too. It may not look like it, but they’re musically inclined too.

Chaeyoung considers Jeongyeon, Sana, and Momo as part of the band too even though they do not perform. She said TWICE’s music would not be the same without them.

After warming up, the band starts with their arrangement of the LAMM approved Digressions by Lizzy LeBlue. It’s a new song Momo manages to find while she’s at pc number thirteen at the internet cafe near their school. The one they always spend their afternoon at.

Sana listens to them perform. She finds it amusing how all of them easily _click_ together. Sana has always been good with socializing, but she finds it magical how her new friends easily accept her.

It’s like they’re meant to be friends.Other people would argue it’s impossible. Two different groups of friends from two ends of the class spectrum. Who would’ve thought they would get along so easily?

But that’s what scares Sana. She remembers this one thing her friend once told her. People tend to drift away from you faster if they get in your life easily. You tend to lose your connection with them easily like how easy they entered your life.

That’s why Sana’s doing her best to deepen their connection. She can’t lose another friend. She can’t go through that again.

_But I didn’t lose her. Not yet._ Sana convinces herself. 

Her mind returns to the present when Momo claps beside her, pitching in praises for everyone except Mina who’s currently looking at her with the usual death glare she’s been giving her since they first met. 

Sana sees Momo wince. And she feels for her. One would think they should be used to it by now but no. Just like Jihyo’s loud voice, no one’s getting used to Mina’s death glare.

Jeongyeon even compared her glare to Medussa. At first they didn’t understand, but Jeongyeon explains to them everything that meets Medussa’s eyes turn to stone.

_They all agree. “If it weren't for my pride I would literally turn to stone right there and then.” Momo hugs herself and shivers in fear as she thinks of Mina’s glare._

Sana could tell Momo’s doing her best not to freeze at the moment. She looks at the band and sees Jihyo bowing. Chaeyoung’s laughing while raising her bass guitar. Tzuyu’s smiling while looking at Chaeyoung. She finds it cute how Tzuyu is always looking at Chaeyoung, admiring her. Mina’s still glaring at Momo.

Meanwhile, Dahyun’s at the very corner with her electric keyboard. Sana notices she’s looking at her, and their eyes widen at the same time. Sana’s heart skips a beat because she didn’t expect it.

When she recovers, she immediately claps for the girl and smiles. She gives her a thumbs up to show how proud she is of her. Although Sana was thinking of other things while they were performing, Sana’s sure she still did well.

It’s Dahyun. Everything Dahyun does is the best. Unlike her, Dahyun does not know how to mess things up. She’s the perfect human being. 

Whoever said that nothing’s perfect clearly haven’t met their Kim Dahyun. _Her_ Kim Dahyun. Dahyun’s just standing there watching Sana clap for her, and Sana thinks she perfected the art of just standing there, looking pretty.

“Yah! Minatozaki I thought I was your friend for eleven years.” Jihyo places a hand over her chest, pretending to be hurt because Sana isn’t cheering for her. All of them laughed, even Mina.

Sana rolls her eyes at Jihyo before standing up and giving her the tightest hug she could. Jihyo’s thankful Sana didn’t manage to squeeze the life out of her.

Everybody gets off the makeshift platform to rest. Dahyun drags her bean bag on the corner, away from the chaos Chaeyoung and Momo are spreading. When Momo’s just about to drag Sana in, she pushes her away.

Sana looks at Dahyun worriedly and approaches her, “Why the long face?”

The other girl looks at her and shrugs. She pouts. “I’m not frowning.”

“Has anyone ever told you you have the best smile in the world?” Sana sits beside Dahyun and manages to squeeze the both of them in one bean bag. 

She stares at their friends. Momo and Chaeyoung are singing with their arms wrapped on each other’s shoulders. Mina’s eating bread, not minding everybody else. Tzuyu’s watching them with a big smile. Jeongyeon’s trying the acoustic guitar while Jihyo’s teaching her. 

All their smiles are beautiful, but there's something in Dahyun’s smile that makes Sana feel lighter. She noticed it a few days ago when Dahyun smiled at her while they were performing. 

“Really?” Dahyun looks at her, not sure if she should believe the girl. Sana look her straight in the eyes and nods. 

“A while ago,” the korean hesitates at first, “you said being pretty must be tiring. Aren't you exhausted?” She looks at the ground, trying to avoid Sana’s gaze.

“Exhausted?” Sana tilts her head. “No, why would I be exhausted? It’s my day off today and— _oh.”_ She realizes what the other girl is trying to say. Sana lets out a chuckle, trying to act cool as her cheeks heat up. Dahyun's cheeks are turning red, too. 

When Sana recovers, she leans to Dahyun closer. The aroma of baby powder fills in the small gap between them. “Do you flirt with your friends like this, too?” She whispers on the other girl's ears. Dahyun jumps a bit which makes Sana smile widely. She likes seeing how her actions affect the other girl.

Flirt. A dangerous word before the cure. In the past, they used the word flirt to pursue another person. 

Today, however, it's used in a _lighter_ context. Used to compliment them and all, but with no motive of pursuing them.

“No, just you.” Dahyun whispers back, she tugs Sana’s arm. The space between them doesn't get wider. If anything, they even got closer. “Don't tell them. I’m embarrassed.”

“But you weren't embarrassed in front of me?” Sana smirks. Dahyun’s grip on Sana losens, but the other girl places her hand back to her arms and doesn’t let go. “It's okay you can flirt with me all you want.”

Sana uses her lips to point at their hands. “Oh, can I hold your hand like this?” 

“You didn't need to ask.”

“I like your warmth.” Sana’s about to place Dahyun’s hand on her face but Momo interrupts.

“They won't even let us in their own little bubble,” she says before throwing a pillow on Sana’s face. “Let go of Dahyun already. They need to practice!”

  
  


* * *

Noise of the crowd fills their ears. When the other band finishes performing, Jihyo's the first one to get on the stage. A few people move and get their phones out to take a picture. Sana could imagine her friend’s smirk as she sets up her acoustic guitar while her back is turned on them.

The rest of the band joins her. They're gaining a bit of fame since they started performing. They're currently in _‘Pierre Uno’_. 

It’s a famous chicken wing place in their town. They also sell alcohol there, but the owner tries his best to keep the place suited for people who are underaged, too.

No seats are left empty. On the corner, Sana sees the owner watching the band with a huge smile on his face. 

His place has gained more customers since they started playing there. It has always been famous, but some people go there specifically for the band.

Jeongyeon and Momo stand quietly beside Sana. They don't have the money to eat and earn their seat there, so they always wait patiently. 

They don't mind though. They enjoy their music and watching them enjoy themselves and do their passion satisfies them.

Dahyun looks at Sana and smiles. She always does this before starting their music. It's also one of the main reasons why Sana likes watching them aside from their music. She gets to steal glances from Dahyun all she wants.

Something about the girl enchants her. A force kind of pulls her in and the girl’s charm just… _gets_ her. 

Jihyo counts to three before all of them chant the band’s newest introduction proposed by Chaeyoung, “One in a million! Hello, we are TWICE!” The crowd cheers. Chaeyoung raises her fist because her idea’s a success. Mina tries to hide her smile when she looks at Chaeyoung. Dahyun and Tzuyu don't. When the noise dies down a bit, Jihyo introduces the first song.

She thanks Jeongyeon, Momo, and Sana for helping them arrange the song. The crowd’s eyes feel hot against them, but it’s because they're not used to it. Some people take their photos before Jihyo steals their attention again.

Tzuyu uses her drumsticks to count to three and the first beat drops.

* * *

“Were we good?!” Jihyo runs and hugs them. She’s reeking of sweat but none of them mind. “Of course we were.”

Sana hugs her back. “Of course, the crowd says it all!” 

Behind her, the four other girls follow. Sana smiles at Dahyun and gives her a thumbs up. She mouths “You’re amazing” to her. The other girl gives her the warmest smile back and mouths “thank you.”

“Me too~” Chaeyoung squeezes herself to the group hug and all of them chuckles. Sana notices Tzuyu standing while watching them, so she pulls her in, too.

Mina and Dahyun keep their distance, both of them have their arms crossed. But Dahyun’s watching them with a smile. Meanwhile, Mina maintains a straight, neutral face.

“Congratulations!” The owner greets them while clapping his hands. “You always deliver a good performance. Our customers always ask for you!”

“Really?” Mina asks.

“Yeah, thanks to you we’re always filled during Saturday nights!”

“We should be the one thanking you, sir. Thank you for allowing us to perform here.” Mina expresses her gratitude.

“It’s nothing.” He waves his hands. “You should eat here tonight! On the house! Take it as my gratitude.”

“But what about our friends? Can they eat here, too?” Tzuyu asks innocently. All of them exchange glances.

“Of course!” The owner laughs nervously.

All of them, except Mina, cheers. Momo and Sana immediately run to the biggest table and look at the menu. 

* * *

Silence fills the table. The only thing you could hear from them is Jihyo, Momo, and Sana munching on the unlimited chicken wings the owner promised. 

Chaeyoung takes another wing, twists the bones, and takes them out. It’s her third plate of wings now. Tzuyu breathes in, trying to keep up with the other girls. She can feel her stomach is close to bursting now, but she can’t just back down.

The girls decided to have a competition on who can eat the most plates of chicken wings in one seating, and the loser would have to pay for their dinner for the next gig. Dahyun, Mina, and Jeongyeon did not join. Mina tried to convince Chaeyoung and Tzuyu not to, but Chaeyoung was insistent.

Now, it’s as if they ate almost all of the wings the restaurant has in store. Finished plates are stacked one after another with ruined plastic gloves on top of it. Their glasses are smeared with oil and there are pitchers of water for each of them.

Sana almost choke on a soft bone and coughs. She reaches for her glass, but it’s empty. Dahyun reaches for the pitcher and pours it for her. “Slow down,” she smiles.

“Thank you,” she says before drinking. “Ahh!” the glass clinks loudly against the table. When Sana looks down at her plate, there are no more wings. She’s about to raise her hand for her fourth plate, but Dahyun stops her.

“Take mine.”

“Are you sure?” Dahyun’s plate looks untouched except for a few bones on the side, and it’s her first plate. It doesn't surprise Sana, though, because she does look like someone who eats like a bird.

“Yeah, it’s okay. I’m not hungry.” The other girl takes Sana’s plate and puts her food. She stacks it on the finished ones.

Sana whispers “Thank you” to Dahyun and winks. Both of them couldn't help but chuckle.

Beside Dahyun, Mina flashes them an amused look. “I should've known food’s the only thing that could keep your mouth shut.” She says to everyone, but only looks at Momo.

Momo tries to say something with her mouth filled with food. Mina frowns at her. “What?”

“I said, I’m sorry we don't always get to eat like this because unlike you, we don't actually have the money.” She rolls her eyes. On the left side of the table sit Jeongyeon, Jihyo, Momo, and Sana. On the right side sit Tzuyu, Chaeyoung, Mina, and Dahyun. 

Dahyun, Mina, and Jeongyeon look at each other, then to the owner who’s faking a smile right now. It must’ve been a sore eyes for him to see such a strange combination of group. 

They’ve always believed birds of the same feathers flock together, so only those who are of upper class only talk to people who belong to their class. 

Dahyun, Mina, Chaeyoung, and Tzuyu’s families are very-well known, and Mina mentioned something like the owner and her father being business partners or something, so he must’ve been confused as to why they’re hanging out with girls like Jihyo, Jeongyeon, Momo, and Sana— girls that are not from the same class. Dahyun flashes him a sweet smile, then back to exchanging glances with Jeongyeon and Mina.

* * *

  
It was no surprise Tzuyu lost their bet a while ago. The girl was already close to vomiting when Sana had her third plate. Mina made Tzuyu promise she would never make a bet with them anymore.

Momo pulls the three of them at the back of Pierre Uno’s building for their usual destressing. They don't usually do this, but the past few days have been too much for them. They needed it.

There are things you pick up from those people around you, and sometimes it is inevitable. This is one of those things for them.

“The chicken would've tasted better with alcohol,” Sana pouts. The three chuckle. Momo lights Jeongyeon’s and Jihyo’s sticks.

  
  


Faint light from the other building's backdoor gives them a low visibility from the dark. In front of them is a fence and beyond extends darkness. It’s almost scary if only Sana was not with her friends.

“We should've told the owner we’d take it out, huh?” Momo smirks as she lights Sana’s.

“Yeah,” she says before taking a puff, “The soju there looked tempting.”

“But have you seen the way the owner looked at us? It’s almost as if we’d run away with all his money.” Jihyo chuckles.

Jeongyeon shakes her head. “It’s funny, though. He’s the only one judging us in there.”

“That's because he’s the only one who knew our background. If the customers knew, we would be thrown out the moment we stepped in.” Momo laughs. Sana finds it confusing how their social class would affect the way people think about their music or about them in general.

Smoke is their only companion for tonight aside from themselves. Deep thoughts would usually drown Sana during times like this, but she could only think of Kim Dahyun. The sweetness of her voice. The rhythm that flows from her fingers to the keyboard. The elegance. The poise. She’s drowning in it.

Before Sana drifts away with the ocean of her thoughts, Momo opens up a topic. “What do you think of Mina?”

“Mina?” Jihyo tilts her head. “I don't know. I think she's cool.”

“I think she's pretty.” Sana says.

Momo kicks Sana jokingly. “I meant about her personality.”

“Oh, I think she's a bit distant and protective of those who are important to her. Have you seen the way she takes care of Dahyun, Chaeyoung, and Tzuyu? She might appear cold outside, but she’s very affectionate in her own way.” 

“I think she’s—” Jeongyeon pauses “—privileged.”

“Isn’t she?!” Momo says in a high-pitched tone. “I’m not bashing her or anything, but I really think she should fix that bourgeoisie attitude of hers.”

“You can’t blame her, though. I mean that’s how she’s raised.” Sana looks at them one by one. “Right? That’s how her parents molded her.”

“Yeah, and she’s trying. Come on, Momo. You know how it feels like to be judged just because of your class. Don’t be like this,” Jihyo looks at Momo.

The girl raises her hand trying to plead her case, her cigarette in between her middle and index finger. “All I’m saying is—”

“She’s a pain in the ass,” Jeongyeon interrupts. Jihyo and Sana let out a disapproving gasp.

“You’re quite right there, Jeong. But what I was trying to say was even though she knew us already, she expects us to act like one of them even though she knows full well we aren’t.”

“Hhmm,” Jeongyeon takes a puff. “I agree with Jihyo. Don’t antagonize her. Give her time.”

“I said,” Momo groans. “Nevermind. Forget I said anything. I’m sorry. You’re right.”

They lean on the wall and don't bring up a topic again. Sana taps her stick to remove the ashes. She’s almost done with her. All of them are enjoying the tranquility cigarettes provide.

“I knew it!” Mina emerges out of nowhere. The four of them mumble curses underneath their breath when she shows up unprompted. The girl should be home by now.

Sana’s eyes widen when she sees Dahyun behind the girl. She tries to hide her cigarette but too late because the girl is already looking at it.

Mina borrows Dahyun’s bag and hits Sana, Momo, then Jihyo. She freezes in front of Jeongyeon, then hits her. Again, again, and again.

“Yah!” Jeongyeon holds Mina’s wrist. The girl flinches when ashes fall on it. Jeongyeon immediately frees her from her grip, eyes with regret.

The Japanese girl looks at her coldly. “I think you deserve to be hit a thousand times.” She hits her again. “That's nothing compared to what you did to me.”

Sana thinks of Mina’s words. Was using gateway drugs so bad Jeongyeon deserved to be hit a thousand times? And why is she hitting Jeongyeon only?

Dahyun steps in. She takes her bag from Mina and pulls her away from Jeongyeon. “Calm down, Mina.”

The girl closes her eyes and inhales deeply. It was brief, but Sana did not fail to see disappointment in her eyes. Mina looks at them one by one. “I’ll take you home.”

Mina starts walking. The five of them, including Dahyun, exchange confused glances. When Mina stops and shoots them a death glare, they follow.

“Wait,” Dahyun stops Sana. She lets their friends go first. When they're out of sight, Dahyun asks “Aren't you cold?” She blows on her palms, rubs it together, and holds Sana’s hands to give her warmth.

Sana smiles. She wasn't really cold, but she appreciates the gesture. She holds Dahyun’s hands and places it on her face. “This is better.”

They smile at each other. Before any of them could say a word, they hear Mina shouting “Where's Dahyun and Sana?”

* * *

The ride on the way home is… chilling. Chaeyoung and Tzuyu already went home before Mina found them at the back of the building doing their thing. Dahyun was picked up by her driver. They were left with Mina.

Mina’s on the shotgun seat looking outside the window. At the back of her van sit Jeongyeon and Jihyo beside each other and Momo and Sana. Except for Jeongyeon, they all exchange worried glances.

For some reason, Sana fears Mina more than her own mother right now. Sana reminds herself to breathe from time to time. 

The thickness of the air makes her forget about her need for oxygen, and the seatbelt feels too tight around her. Momo squeezes her hand to remind her she’s not alone.

The van halts to a stop. Sana squints her eyes through the heavily tinted window and sees Jeongyeon and Jihyo’s block. Quickly, the four of them unbuckles and runs for the door.

Mina gets out of the van with them. Jihyo, Momo, and Sana squeeze themselves behind Jeongyeon. The girl looks around the neighborhood, and the usual near curfew scenario greets her. Closed curtains. Empty streets. 

Some people, cured ones, peek outside their houses. They’re not used to seeing luxurious vehicles around their neighborhood. Sana figures they will be the star for tomorrow's gossip.

“I’m not compelled to befriend you,” Mina starts. All of them nod in agreement. “But since my friends like all of you, it seems I have no choice but to interact.”

“We like all of you, too.” Sana peeks behind Jeongyeon’s shoulder and smiles at her. When she sees Mina’s glare, she whimpers and goes back to her place. Momo rubs her back.

“I’m not threatening but if any of you hurt my friends, I won't back down.” 

Sana gets it. It’s Mina’s overprotective nature acting. It’s okay, she thinks. Jeongyeon, Jihyo, and Momo could be overprotective too. Sana, too, would do _anything_ to protect them.

“Mina, if this is about what we did before, we already said we’re sorry.” Jeongyeon says calmly.

That day during Jihyo's audition, the first thing she did to them was apologize. Then, the three follow. They figured all of them must have been confused as to why they did it, so Jihyo explained it to them.

It took a moment for the Xavier girls to absorb, but eventually understands it. The other three said they forgive them, and they're all cool. Everyone seems to have moved on except Mina.

Sana doesn't blame her, though. It's not easy to trust someone who was paid to get revenge on you, so she does not hold it against Mina. It's not like she has the right to, anyway.

She wishes Mina would give them another chance to gain her trust and start all over with a blank canvass. They promised they won't do something like that again. Knowing Mina, though, she probably doesn't trust them that's why she's talking to them right now.

“I’m sorry. We won't do something like that to all of you again. Pinky promise,” Sana raises her pinky finger. “Besides, we already treat you as friends. We will never hurt any of you intentionally.”

“I would've returned the money if only I didn't use it on something else already. We’re really sorry, Mina.” Jihyo says.

Mina looks at Momo who's still hiding behind Jeongyeon. She steps into the light while scratching the back of her ear and mumbles something. When Mina asks to repeat what she says, Momo looks her straight in the eye and says “I’m sorry.”

Behind the shadows, a figure catches Sana’s attention. It was as swift as a cat, but Sana knows her too well. She squints to confirm her intuition.

Mina says something. It does not make sense because she’s far from the figure, but Sana could only hear the figure’s footsteps and heavy breathing. Like she just ran away from something. Trying to blend with the dark.

Before she disappears, Sana’s quick to her feet and chases after her. She could hear her friends shout her name. 

Her fear for Mina does not stop her. She needs to talk to the girl.

When Sana picks up her pace, the other girl does, too. Sana wants to call her but it’s deep into the night and the neighbors must be on their bed already. She didn't want to cause a ruckus.

Cold wind slaps her face. She doesn't remove her eyes on the girl.

She stops in front of their houses. The girl’s back is still turned to her, but Sana knows someone has been following her. Otherwise, she wouldn't run like it was for her dear life.

“Nayeon,” Sana slows down her pace. She puts her hands on her knees and catches her breath.

“Sana,” the girl looks at her, eyes wide in surprise.

She smiles when she hears her name from the other girl. So she still remembers. That's a relief. She wouldn't know how to feel if Nayeon, the first person she ever considered as a friend, forgot her.

Sana stands straight up and absorbs it all on. It's really Im Nayeon in front of her. All alive and breathing and in one piece.

“It’s been six years,” Sana says.

#

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #sh42  
> @sanasiopao


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